"I am not worthy of such a woman," he said to himself; "I must become so, and when, by dint of patience, unselfishness, self-denial and respect, I have succeeded—why, then perhaps I shall feel that I have the right to say to her: 'Love me.'"
But he sometimes wondered if that day would come before the unforeseen events of the future had disposed of Julie's fate; then he would say to himself:
"Very well; I shall possess her esteem, perhaps her friendship, and the time I shall have devoted to governing myself with dignity will not be wasted."
Madame Thierry was surprised and overjoyed therefore to find that his cheerfulness and all the symptoms of physical and moral well-being reappeared suddenly, on the very day of this momentous episode.
"My friend," she said to Marcel when they were alone for a moment, "I dare not tell you what is passing through my mind; but he has such a happy look! Mon Dieu! do you believe it is possible?"
"What?" said Marcel. "Oh! yes, you are speaking of his visit to Madame d'Estrelle! Well, such things have been known, my dear aunt; he is good-looking enough and agreeable enough to please a great lady; but she is ruined and can extricate herself only by a wealthy marriage, which it is our duty to desire for her, on the condition that the man is not too old. I do not believe she is as bold and courageous as you were, and, moreover, the plan that succeeded with you is generally ruinous; a great passion is a number that wins only once in a hundred thousand times in the lottery of destiny! Let us not wish that for Julien and for her!"
"No, I don't wish it; it is too dangerous, as you say; but if she does take a fancy to him, what will happen?"
"I have no idea; but she is virtuous and he is an honorable man; they will both suffer. It would be better to separate them if possible."
"To be sure! that is what I said to you in the beginning. But what a pity! They are both so handsome, so young and so good! Ah! fate is very unjust sometimes! If my poor husband had left Julien the fortune we once had, he might have been a suitable match for her, as she is poor and without family pride! Alas! may God forgive me! this is the first time I ever blamed my André. Let us say no more about it, Marcel, let us say no more about it!"
"We must think about it, none the less," replied the solicitor, "and not let Julien's heart burn too fiercely. To-day, it is fireworks, because he probably has some hope; but to-morrow it may be a conflagration."