FAMILY. The only cure for race suicide.

FAVOR. Something we do for a friend so he can forget about it.

FLATTERER. A man who makes friends until he begins to talk about himself.

FORGER. A man who tries to make a name for himself, but who picks out the wrong name.

FRIEND. A man who knows you are a liar, but hopes otherwise.

FRIENDSHIP. The name of the handle some people put on other people for the purpose of using them.

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FOOTBALL. A system of manslaughter very fashionable with boys. From the Latin words "footibus," meaning "put the boots to him," and "balloona," meaning "up in the air, or, who hit me with a public building?" A body of college students surrounded by ambulances. For instance: