“‘But with so intelligent a people, may not these abuses be remedied?’
“‘Intelligent?’ said he, with a sigh. ‘The people in America are frequently informed that they are very intelligent and free, but would a very intelligent people shovel coal so furiously into the furnace of a locomotive that was rapidly running their train to the devil?’
“‘In theory, the Americans have erected the most symmetrical political temple, at whose altars the devout head of patriotism ever bowed a humble allegiance; but in practice,’ said he with emotion, ‘well, the upper rooms are occupied by schemers and the halls are crowded by a more rapacious set of money-changers than the Master whipped from the temple of Jerusalem.’
“‘Dollars, dollars,’ said he bitterly, ‘there is nothing in America more potent than a million dollars.’ Then after a moment’s silence he muttered, ‘yes, five millions are more potent.’
“‘However, it would be mockingly absurd,’ he sorrowfully continued, ‘for any American to hoist a danger signal, for the pleasures of the occasion must not be marred; but,’ said he, with a gleam of satisfaction, ‘while Belshazzar is playing high jinks at the feast, Daniel is changing his slippers, making ready for a call. As a fact,’ said my companion, ‘America is being looted by her caretakers, and, while the Philistines are packing away the booty, the silly Samsons are sleeping in the lap of Delilah.’
“My friend was eloquent and impressive—his language was lurid and expressive, his manner was quite American, and I sympathised with him, for ’tis sad to behold the patriot, sitting with bowed head and solemn visage, contemplating the waning glory of his own proud country, and he seemed very earnest.
“Well,” said Oseba, “we pulled up at a pretty city where there was confusion, and my friend disenrailed. As he stepped off, he met some friends. They, too, looked unhappy, and, feeling inquisitive, I alighted, and observing a pleasant looking fellow on the platform I approached him, and waving toward my late companion’s party, I interrogatively said: ‘Funeral?’
“The man actually laughed, and observing my seriousness, and that I was not of his country, he laughed again, and glancing at my friend’s group, he said:—
“‘Funeral, stranger! We’ve had an election, and it was the d——st landslide ever seen in these parts, and he—ha! ha!—is out in the cold.’”