The Stewarde of a Noble mans house, may not be so bolde to invite straungers, uppon his owne head, and set them downe at his Lorde & Maisters table. And there is none that is wise, will be intreated to it, at his request alone. But otherwhile, the servaunts of the house, be so malepert and saucie, that they will take uppon them, more then their Maister: of which things wee speake in this place, more by chaunce, then that the order we have taken from the beginning, doth so require it.
A man must not uncase him selfe, in the presence of any assembly. "For it is a slovenly sight, in place where honest men be met together of good condition and calling. And it may chaunce he doth uncover those parts of his bodie, which work him shame & rebuke to shewe them: besides yt, it maketh other men abashed to looke upon them. Againe, I wold have no man to combe his head, nor washe his hands before men. For such things would be done alone in your chamber, and not abrode: without it be, I say, to washe your hands when you sit downe to the table. For, there it shall doe well, to washe them in sight, although you have no neede: that they with whome you feede, may assure them selves you have done it. A man must not come forthe with his kercheif, or quaife one his head, nor yet stroke up his hosen uppon his legges in company.
"Some men there be, that have a pride or a use to drawe their mouthes a little awry, or twinckle up their eye, & to blow up their cheekes, and to puffe, and to make, with their countenaunce, sundrie such like foolishe and ilfavoured faces and gestures." I councell men to leave them cleane. For, Pallas her selfe, the Goddesse (as I have hearde some wise men say) tooke once a greate pleasure to sound the flute & the cornet: & therin she was verie cunning. It chaunst her, on day, sounding her Cornet for her plesure over a fontain, she spide her selfe in the water: and when she beheld those strange gestures she must nedes make with her mouth as she plaid: she was so much ashamed of it that she brake the cornet in peces & cast it away.
And truely she did but well, for it is no instrument for a woman to use. And it becomes men as ill, "if they be not of yt base condition and calling, that they must make it a gaine, & an art to live uppon it. And looke what I speake, concerning the unseemely gestures of the countenance and face: concerneth likewise, all the partes and members of man. For it is an ill sight, to lill out ye tounge, to stroke your bearde much up and downe (as many doe use to doe) to rubbe your hands together: to sighe, & to sorrowe: to tremble or strike your selfe, which is also a fashion wt some: to reatche and stretche your selfe, & so retching, to cry out after a nice maner, Alas, Alas: like a country cloune, yt should rouse him selfe in his couche."
And he that makes a noise wt his mouth in a token of wonder, and other while, of contempte and disdaine: "counterfeteth an ilfavoured grace. And Counterfet things, differ not muche from truethes."
A man must leave those foolishe maner of laughings, groase and uncomely. "And let men laughe uppon occasion, and not uppon custome. But a man must beware he doe not laughe at his owne gestes, and his doings. For that makes men weene hee woulde faine praise him selfe. It is for other men to laughe that heare, and not for him that telles the tale."
Now, you must not beare your selfe in hand, that bycause eache of these matters considered a parte, is but a small fault, ye hole therefore together should be as light: but you must rather persuade your selfe yt Many a litle doth make a mickle, as I tould you from the beginning. And how muche lesse they be, so much the more neede a man hathe to looke well in to them: bycause they be not easily perceived a far of, but creepe in to us by custom, before we be a ware. And, As light expences often used, in Continuance of time, doe covertly waste and consume a greate masse of wealth and riches: So doe these light faultes with the multitude and number of them, in secret overthrow all honest and good civilitie and maner. So yt we must not make a light reconing of them.
Moreover, it is a nedefull observation to bethinke your selfe, how you doe move your bodie, and specially in talke. "For, it many times chaunceth, a man is so ernest in his tale, that hee hath no minde of any thing els. One wagges his head. Another lookes bigg and scowles with his browes. That man pulls his mouth awry. And tother spittes in and uppon their faces with whome he talkes. And som suche there be that move their hands in suche a sorte, as if they should chase ye flies as they go: which be very unhansome & unseemely maners to use." And I have heard it saide (for you knowe I have byn familiarly acquainted with learned men in my time) that Pindarus that worthy man was wont to saye: that "Whatsoever it were that had a good & savourie taste: was seasoned by the hands of the Graces. Now, what shall I speake of them yt come forthe of their studies with their penne in their eare: and nibble their hankercheifs in their mouthe, or ly lolling wt their legge over the table, or spit one their fingers, and of a number of other blockishe gestures and fashions more then these, which cannot be all rehearsed well: nor shal not, I meane, put me to further paines to tel them al if I could. For, there be manie perchaunce will say this is to muche, that I have said allredie."
FINIS