Strictly speaking, the act of coitus should be considered as composed of four parts, or acts, of one common play, or drama. Not that there is a sharp line of demarcation between each act or part, for the four really blend into one composite whole, when taken together, seriatim; but there are four phases of the act which may well be studied separately, in making a detailed review of a sexual meeting of a man and a woman.
These four parts are: first, the preparation for the act; second, the union of the organs; third, the motion of the organs; fourth, the orgasm.
In what immediately follows, these four stages of the act of coitus will be studied and traced in detail, with the utmost care, in the hope that such pursuit may result in the best possible good to the student.
Regarding the first part of the act, let it be said that here, above all other situations in the world "haste makes waste." Put that down as the most fundamental fact in this whole affair! Right here is where ninety-nine one-hundredths of all the troubles of married life begin! And the fault, right here, is usually (though not always) with the husband! But he doesn't mean to be bad. Not once in a thousand times does he deliberately purpose to do wrong. He is simply the victim of undirected and ungoverned passion, and of an ignorance which results in stupid blundering, or carelessness, or thoughtlessness. What such a husband practically does is to rush blindly and furiously along a way he knows nothing of, but which he has been led to think he has a right to travel when and how he will! The ordinary figure of a "bull in a china shop" can but faintly describe the smashing and grinding to powder of the most delicate situation that can occur in all human experiences, that result from such action as this. Ideals that have touched heaven are tumbled from their lofty places and ruthlessly crushed to atoms; hopes that were beyond the power of words to express go out in despair; dreams become a hideous nightmare; and love, which was as pure as crystal waters, is muddied, befouled, and made into a cesspool! And all this because of ignorance or careless hurrying, of making haste where the utmost of time, caution and intelligent care should have obtained!
As has already been explained, when the act of coitus is to be engaged in, the sex organs of both the man and the woman undergo great changes. Blood rushes to all these parts, in copious quantities, till they become gorged. The result is that the penis is enlarged to several times its dormant size, and the vulva and vagina should, and will, under right conditions, undergo similar changes and transformation.
But there is usually a great difference in the length of time it takes for these changes to take place in men and women. On the part of the man, as soon as his passion is aroused to any considerable extent, the penis at once makes itself ready for action. It "tumesces," or swells itself hard, almost instantly; and, so far as its mere physical stoutness is concerned, is as ready to enter the vagina then as ever, even if it has to force itself in.
On the other hand, the tumescence of the parts in women is usually, (especially as girls are reared) not infrequently, a matter of considerable time, not infrequently several minutes, and now and then, of half-an-hour or more! This is not always so, for in some very passionate women they are ready for action almost instantly. Indeed, there are some women whose sex organs tumesce if they (the women) even touch a man—any man—and occasionally a case occurs where a woman will experience an orgasm if her clothing brushes against a man! Such cases are, of course, abnormal. But, for the most part, it is true that women are much slower in making ready for the sexual act than men are.
Again, as the organs become ready for the act, nature has provided a most wonderful means for bringing about their easy and happy union. Both the male and female organs secrete and emit, or pour out, a sort of lubricating fluid which covers and sometimes almost floods the parts. This is a clear and limpid substance, that looks much like the white of an egg, and is much like the saliva that is secreted in the mouth, only it is a thicker substance. Chemically, it is almost identical with saliva. That generated by the man is called "prostatic flow;" that produced by the woman "pre-coital secretion."
Now, if time is given for this fluid to be secreted and exuded, all the parts become covered or saturated with it, and they are admirably equipped for easy union. The glans penis is then covered with the slippery fluid, and the vulva and all the walls of the vagina are laved with the substance. At the same time, the vaginal walls have widened and grown soft, and all the parts of the vulva (which are yet to be named and described in detail) are in like condition. The result is that, though the penis be what might at first seem of such size as to make its entrance into the vagina impossible, as a matter of fact, such entrance is perfectly easy, when the parts are fully ready to be joined. But not before or otherwise!
So here is where the trouble comes. If the husband is in haste, if he does not wait for the wife to become ready to meet him; if he forces his large, hard penis into the vagina before either is fully ready for such union—when there is no prostatic fluid on its glans, and the vagina is shrunken and its walls are dry—if coitus is engaged in in this way, it is perfectly easy to see that only disaster can result! The woman is hurt, sometimes most cruelly, and the man in reality gets only a beastly gratification from the act. Of all bad things in all the world, such manner of coition is the worst!