“NEXT gentleman,” the nervous scissors wait

To spoil the hair off some reflecting pate.

“The unemployed, Sir?—half of them are thieves,

Who soil propriety like autumn leaves.”

I wait until my turn. The crack of doom

Summons me from a plush-protected tomb.

“Short round the edge, but not too short will do,

And then I think I’ll have a dry shampoo.”

The scissors ballet-dance about one ear,

Some hairs have fallen down my neck, I fear.