A GIRL'S idea of business is a place where she can meet some man who will take her out of it. IN THE "relation of the sexes" a man is so likely to regard his wife as the "poor relation." NO MAN refuses to give a good wife all the credit she deserves; but some of them are rather shy about giving her cash to the same amount. A WOMAN on her summer vacation soon discovers that a husband is not "a man of letters," but a man of off-hand notes and telegrams. A LOVER looks at women through rose-colored spectacles, an old bachelor through blue glasses, and a married man—through a microscope. |
| A MAN always feels deeply injured when
his wife refuses to believe the story that
he has worked at all the way up in the
cab to make sound interesting and perfectly
plausible.
IT inspires a man with real awe and admiration,
after he has spent all day Sunday and
broken half the family tools fussing over a
fractious lock, to see his wife come along
and pick it with one hand and a hairpin.
WHENEVER a man makes up his mind
to give up anything, from a woman to a
vice, it suddenly becomes so attractive to
him that he begins to take a new and violent
interest in it.
THE hard part of separating from a husband
or wife for summer vacation is trying to
look sorry about it when you say good-by
at the station.
|
TRAIN up a son in the way he should go—and then watch him go some other woman's way. MAKING hay while the sun shines is very tame sport beside making love while the moon shines. THE dollar sign is the only sign in which the modern man appears to have any real faith. IT IS a mistake to propose to a girl with whom you have been mooning all morning on the beach until you discover whether that pang you feel is really heart hunger or only the other kind of hunger; the two have such similar effects. YOU can lead a husband to the restaurant, but you can't make him order champagne—unless it's another woman's husband. |
| LOVE seldom follows marriage, unless marriage
follows love.
WHEN a man says that "circumstances"
have forced him to break his engagement
with you, it is pretty safe to conclude
that "Circumstances" wears smarter
frocks or has a more fascinating way of
doing her hair.
SOME bright day women will learn that it
is as impossible to revive a man's interest
in a girl whom he has ceased to love as to
make him want stale champagne with all
the fizz gone out of it.
ALL the great tragedies are written about
the woman who isn't married to some
man, but ought to be; when as a matter of
fact the most tragic figure on earth is the
woman who is married to him and
oughtn't to be.
|
THERE are two kinds of masculine hearts; the kind like a peach, soft and impressionable on the outside, but stony at the core; and the kind like a nut, seemingly impenetrable, but sweet and satisfying once you get through the shell. A MAN doesn't object to a girl who smokes cigarettes, wears three-ply collars and calls him "old chap" because he considers her immoral, but because he considers her just a bad imitation of himself. A WOMAN can do nothing wrong, as long as a man is in love with her, and nothing right after he ceases to be. THE only way to be happy with a man is to have such blind faith that you can believe him when he vows he never kissed another woman, even though the scent of the last girl's sachet still clings to his coat lapel. |