O one to greet me with her tear-stained eyes,
No one to doubt my quaint, fantastic lies,
No one my foolish looks to criticize—
Ah, but the knots, the KNOTS in marriage-ties!





H Friend, could you and I, somehow, conspire,
To grasp the Matrimonial Scheme entire,
Would we not shatter it to bits—and then,
Make of its bonds a rousing Funeral Pyre?





YSELF, when young, did eagerly frequent
The weddings of my friends on Bondage bent;
But evermore thanked Fate, when I escaped
Scot-free, by that same door wherein I went.





NTO the fatal compact, why not knowing,
I've seen them go, nor dream where they were going;
Then out again, with shouts of "Westward, ho!"
The bitter seeds of Alimony sowing!





H well, they say that, sometimes, side by side,
A cat and dog may peacefully abide.
Perhaps—perhaps. But that is only when
That cat and dog are not together tied!