Skinner's Dress Suit

by Henry Irving Dodge

Next morning, good commuter that he was, Skinner made his customary dash for his train. Honey was used to this, but she was not prepared for what followed on this particular morning.

Skinner had only got halfway down to the gate when he saw Stephen Colby's car coming down the road. Here was the multi-millionaire, with whom he had talked on terms of equality the night before, making for the Pullman end of his train—here was he, Skinner, in his shabby old clothes. Would Colby recognize him or would n't he? First, Skinner was afraid he would n't, then he was afraid he would. He decided not to chance it. He darted back into the vestibule, drew the door half to, and waited until the magnate's car had passed; then he emerged from his hiding-place and made one of his characteristic heel-and-toe sprints for the depot. When he got there, he hurried into the smoker—the laboring man's club.

Skinner repeated this somewhat eccentric advance, retreat, and quick dash maneuver for three successive days, dodging the formidable car of the magnate, and hoping that Honey might not be at her customary place at the front window to watch him off to his train. At first, he was amused. It was a joke on himself, he thought. But repetition presently dulled the edge of comedy. On the fourth occasion of this apparently unaccountable behavior on Skinner's part, the "cage man" began to meditate the matter.

Would he have to do this dodging act every day, like a fugitive, he wondered? It was dawning upon him that his shabby clothes had made him a fugitive from respectability. By jingo! He sat up straight as he realized for the first time that he was the only poorly dressed commuter of whom Meadeville might boast. He had prided himself that he'd never given a cuss what other people thought of his clothes, so long as his bank account was intact. By Jove! Perhaps he'd never known what they thought because they were too polite to tell him!

If he'd had no one but himself to consider, Skinner would have made the plunge and bought a new business suit right away—even in the face of what that might entail. And his experience with the dress suit had taught him that every purchase was fraught with complex possibilities. But how could he spring it on Honey—chief guardian of the bank account?

Honey, too, pondered Skinner's curious dash out and back, the first day he did it. She had her suspicions, but said nothing. She simply waited until the following morning to confirm them. And when the whole combination of circumstances—Skinner's advance, Colby's car appearing down the road, Skinner's retreat—was repeated, it was as plain as an open book to the perspicacious little lady. Dearie was shabby, and for the first time in his life he had realized the disadvantage of it. She was secretly glad, for she had always felt that Dearie's thrift with regard to clothes was misplaced. But she could never get him to see it that way. The mere flashing by of Stephen Colby had done more for Skinner in that particular than years of affectionate solicitude on her part. "Really," she mused, "some men have to be blasted out of a rut with dynamite!"

From recent experience, Honey deduced that Skinner would shy at any new purchase, with its ramifying possibilities. Then how to prepare the way? Honey was an arch diplomat—and—Honey was a great cook.

Honey met Skinner at the door the evening of the fourth day and gently drew him into the dining-room.

"Look!" she cried, pointing to the table. "Oysters!—and later—beefsteak! Think of it! Beefsteak!"

Skinner noted with some relief that it was the same formula she had used on a previous memorable occasion. What could it presage? Was it possible that his soul and her soul had but a single thought? Had he betrayed himself by his shuttle-like performance of the past four mornings? Had she observed him, and was she "wise"?