To the Nobility, Gentry, and Others.
PATENCE, Surgeon by Birth, and Dentist, having had ten Years Practice, performs every Operation on the Teeth, Gums, &c., with superior Skill, and whose Cures are not excelled or even equalled by any Dentist whatever. And as a Confirmation of the same, please to observe the following:—
October 5. A Gentleman who had lost all his Teeth, his Gums ulcerated and scorbutic, in five Days made a perfect Cure, fixed him in a whole set of natural Teeth, without Springs or any Fastening.
October 16. A Lady whose Jaw was fractured by a Barber, her Teeth loose, her Gums ulcerated, attended with a running Matter, and an inflammation in her Cheeks, with a callous Swelling, cured without poulticing or cutting.
October 20. A Lady that had lost all her upper Teeth by using Powders and Tinctures that are advertised to cure Everything, her Mouth ulcerated, and her Breath nauseous, is now delicately Clean, and replaced the Teeth with those that never change their Colour.
Sunday, October 29. Perfectly relieved a Person that had lost both Palate and Speech; when he drank or eat it came out at his Nostrils, and had been in that state three Years; he had applied to Surgeons and several Hospitals, who deemed him incurable, and told him, one and all, he could have no Relief; he now speaks articulate, eats and drinks with Pleasure, which if any one should doubt, he can refer them to the Man. These, with upwards of three thousand Operations and Cures, have been accomplished by your humble Servant, M. Patence.
At No. 403, in the Strand, near Southampton Street, London. Where the Teeth, though ever so foul, are made delicately white in six Minutes, and Medicines given for their preservation, for half a Guinea, any hour after ten in the Morning. Advice gratis, and profound Secrecy if required.
☞ Envy may snarl, but superior Abilities assists the Afflicted.
There must be something very ambitious about a man who, not satisfied with being dentist and dancing-master, assumes the title of “surgeon by birth.” It is noticeable that though Patence was born a surgeon, he did not discover it till he had been at dentistry and dancing for some years.[37] But in 1775 and thereabouts quacks were not very particular as to their statements. In September 1776 the Morning Post contains a very lengthy advertisement, put forth by one Lattese, a Piedmontese, who states that he has “by a long course of experiments discovered the wonderful secret of procreating either sex at the joint option of the parents. Should their desire be to have a girl, the success cannot be warranted with absolute certainty, though the chances will be highly in favour of such an event; but should they concur in their wishes to have a son, they may rely that by strictly conforming to a few easy and natural directions, they will positively have a boy.” Mr Lattese is so satisfied with the result of his experience that he is satisfied to await the result, and, no satisfaction, no pay. However much we may have advanced in some directions since the days of Patence and Lattese—though we now have railroads, steamboats, tramways, electric telegraphs, a penny post, vote by ballot, asphalt pavement, and good-templarism—it must be admitted that we have, in grasping at mere bubbles, lost many true arts. Among those unfortunately forgotten must, we are sorry to assume, be ranked those of breeding boys at will and surgeons à discretion.
It is curious how anxious many of the quacks are that they shall not be confounded with their rivals, and their addresses are often given with wonderful exactness. Of this we will add another example, which, though some years later than the one about Baldwin’s Gardens, is in no way less distinct. It would seem, from many references in old newspapers, that the term Maypole was used for a certain portion of the Strand long after the shaft itself had been removed:—