A History of Advertising from the Earliest Times.

by Henry Sampson

In the same year an advertisement was published in the papers directing the ignorant in such matters where to apply in the event of their wishing to obtain the benefits of the agency and the services of the clergyman of the Church of England and graduate of the University of Oxford:—

MATRIMONIAL ALLIANCE.—The Pamphlets, Rules, and Regulations of this Establishment for promoting Matrimonial Alliances, may be obtained by applying to A. B. care of Mr. Proudfoot, 63, Mortimer Street, Cavendish Square. Price of the pamphlet one shilling. The Portfolio of February is now ready, containing letters from gentlemen in every sphere of life, possessing property from £400 to £3000 per annum, and may be purchased or inspected by ladies, free of charge, at the agent’s, 63, Mortimer Street, as above.

Notwithstanding the honours of the clergyman and the contents of the portfolio, the old-fashioned and insulated notions of English folk were too much for the Alliance, which in due course faded from sight and recollection. Possibly the graduate sought those happier climes to which he refers in his exordium, and there made two into one as often as he could wish. Ten years or more after Mr Proudfoot and his reverend friend had departed from the scene, the following, which is suggestive of a still smaller agency, appeared. It is a unique specimen of the use to which artful and designing folks can under any set professions put advertisements:—

TO GIRLS OF FORTUNE.—MATRIMONY.—A bachelor, young, amiable, handsome, of good family, and accustomed to move in the highest sphere of society, is embarrassed in his circumstances. Marriage is his only hope of extrication. This advertisement is inserted by one of his friends. Ingratitude was never one of his faults, and he will study for the remainder of his life to prove his estimation of the confidence placed in him. Address, post paid L. L. H. L., 47 King Street, Soho.—N.B. The witticisms of cockney scribblers deprecated.

This was evidently concocted by a man who knew what would be most likely to attract silly spinsters of a romantic turn of mind and independent means. Did he succeed? We cannot say, but sincerely hope not, as the professions are too good to be sincere, and his pretensions are pitched too high to be genuine. The following has been already compared with the handsome bachelor’s effusion:—

MATRIMONIAL ADVERTISEMENT. I hereby give notice to all unmarried women that I, John Hobnail, am at this writing five and forty, a widower, and in want of a wife. As I wish no one to be mistaken, I have a good cottage with a couple of acres of land, for which I pay 2l. a-year. I have five children, four of them old enough to be in employment; three sides of bacon and some pigs ready for market. I should like to have a woman fit to take care of her house when I am out. I want no second family. She may be between 40 and 50 if she likes. A good sterling woman would be preferred, who would take care of the pigs.

This was originally given in Blackwood over twenty years ago. John Hobnail is plain-spoken, but he is evidently honest, and no greater contrast could be afforded to L. L. H. L. than John’s desires for a mate. Here is no high-falutin’ nonsense, and romance-reading young ladies were doubtlessly horrified at the use to which John would put a “good sterling woman.” But there may, after all, be heroism in pig-feeding; and many a brave lady would quail before a hungry sow and her litter. Some might also object to the contiguity in which Mr Hobnail places his porkers and his children. Differing from John Hobnail very widely, yet in the same agricultural interest, is the author of the next application, which a good many years nearer the present time than the Blackwood specimen, appeared in a Yorkshire journal. The effusion is in its way almost as curious as the two are which immediately precede it—at least we think so, whatever our readers may do:—

WANTED a WIFE, by a handsome young FARMER who is desirous of becoming domesticated, and of enjoying the society of a young, good-tempered female, who would tempt him away from his market festivities by her pleasing and gently persuasive manners. She must not exceed 20, unless she be a widow, whose family must not exceed six. Want of beauty would be no kind of objection, provided she possessed from 1,000l. to 2,000l. His rent, tithes, and taxes are all paid up, and he is wholly free from debt. All that he requires is love, peace, and happiness. Apply —— near Tenbury.

All he requires is love, peace, and happiness. Love of course includes beauty; and so we can manage to understand that his object really is love and beauty, or a thousand pounds, and two if possible. How he can expect peace, to say nothing of happiness, when he gives a widow with six children a chance, passes our comprehension. But some men will do anything for money, and we regret to say that this handsome young farmer appears, after all, to be of a most mercenary description. While we are so far north, we may as well turn to Sheffield, in which town, about five years ago, a very amusing police case, having its origin in a matrimonial advertisement, was heard. The complaint was laid against three young men of the town of blades, named respectively George Herd, Joseph Fidler, and Arthur Harrop, who were charged by John Wilmer Lambert, “for that they did unlawfully, maliciously, and knowingly, with intent to provoke a breach of the peace, cause to be inserted in a certain public newspaper, called the Sheffield Independent, a certain false, scandalous, and defamatory statement of libel of and concerning one John Wilmer Lambert, and against the peace of our Lady the Queen.” The libel thus described was as follows:—

TO SINGLE YOUNG WOMEN.—A young man wishes to meet with a partner for life. Any young lady feeling disposed, apply by letter, WILMER LAMBERT, auger filer, St Mary’s-road, Sheffield.