WASHDAY.
Remarks:
Brought one of the Balaam trick donkeys on deck. Ham had a terrible tumble. They wanted me to ride him, but I thought it would be undignified.—Band concert tonight. I was the audience. The music caused such a disturbance down in the hold that the band had to quit. I never was so grateful to those animals before.—We’re going about ¼ of a knot an hour. I wonder if an ark ever will be built to go as fast as one knot.—There’s another little rattle in the rattlers’ box.—Ham took our pictures today.
Remarks:
Stopped all last night on account of a fog. I’m not taking any chances with the Ark.—Gave the elephants an extra peanut today. Japheth raised Cain with me. He’s a regular Scotchman.—This afternoon we took Jumbo out, and gave the ladies a ride. It looked like a circus parade. Wish I had a motion picture of it.—We also had the races on deck. The boys ran a marathon. I lost interest—too long. Afterwards I won the potato race.
THURSDAY. December 31, b.c. 2349.
Remarks:
It’s tomorrow now. We all sat around watching the old year out, and the new year in. At eight bells—midnight—the Ark whistles began to blow. The family jumped up on the tables, waved flags and blew horns. Shem opened a bottle of wine.—This is pretty late for me to be up, but I like a party once in awhile. I haven’t had one since the Ark was christened.
Remarks:
Wished everybody a happy yom kippur.—Am going to turn over some new leaves today. Resolved to stop allowing Mrs. Noah to run the Ark, to abandon wine, and swear off swearing. I am also going to keep a diary.—We had some fine stewed rabbit for supper.—Received a few New Year cards.—I am glad I have resolved to abstain from wine. In this antiquity there is little comfort in becoming inebriated. And, then, I don’t like that feeling I have in my head the morning after. It would be a blessing to humanity if someone would invent a remedy for that pain. I use a towel and ice water. Yes, I’m going to stop, and set a good example to my offspring.