A Girl enter’d into the third Septenary passes soon into a Woman; but commonly speaking she is much sooner such in her Person and Appetites than in her Understanding: whence arise many of those glaring Mistakes they daily commit. A Girl who is tall generally conceits she is wise; and because ’till now she has liv’d without controul, she thinks Subjection and Obedience to her Parents, mean and slavish. It would be a Reflection on young Ladies to say they have no Manners, but still it is too generally true that their Manners are false ones; springing from Pride, and influenc’d by it. A Girl (of any Figure in Life) soon knows that the World has it’s Eyes upon her; and as there are certain Motives which induce her to exert all her Skill to seem well bred, so there are certain Times she really appears to advantage: but let the Mask be thrown off; let the Restraint be taken away by which she is confin’d; and we shall soon see where her Manners lye: we shall (I am afraid) oftentimes discover that they are not the Dictates of a well-regulated Heart. But as my Tenderness for the Sex will not suffer me designedly to misrepresent things, let us examine fairly the Conduct of a young Lady according to the too general Mode of breeding.
It appears already that the first Stage of Life was wholly spent in gratifying her Humour; the second was employ’d in a superficial Education, resembling in some measure a Building ornamented without, but ill contriv’d and useless within. Self-will, Vanity and Pleasure have hitherto been her Guides; and these instead of being check’d, are in the third Stage, greatly strengthen’d and augmented: and have besides added to them a boundless Love of Power and Uncontroul. Now from such a Source what Virtues can we expect to flow? What Miseries may we not fear? Alas! too soon are we convinc’d that her whole Soul is absorb’d in Pleasures; her Head runs round with them; she is continually contriving, plotting, scheming; and all Opposition of her Parents becomes too weak: she has not, perhaps, a Spark of real Duty, nor the least Sense of her misguided Steps: and happy is it for her if her mistaken Conduct does not in the End plunge her into Sorrow too great to support. Happy is it for her if the Stream of Pleasure she is borne down with does not insensibly carry away her Honour and Virtue; or at least dash her on the fatal Rock of a miserable Marriage. Wherever this Portrait is found to be genuine, let it be remember’d, that the Painter who draws a real Likeness ought not to be blam’d for the Disagreeableness of the Features.
Many, it is true, have Fortune to support their Pleasures, however expensive or irregular; but where that fails, where Fortune is small, and the Propensity to Pleasure great, Honour and Virtue stand so very tottering, that they are in perpetual Danger: and if with this unbridled Love of Pleasure, there be a tolerable share of Wit or Beauty, or both; who that reflects, can help trembling even at the Apprehension of a Fall? But tho’ a young Lady should escape those innumerable Calamities which her giddy Conduct has laid her open to, what Hopes are there, that she who has never borne Contradiction, will so demean herself as to become amiable in the Eyes of others, or be happy in herself?
I could with great facility delineate a variety of shapes hideous to behold, which young People of both Sexes shew themselves in, when guided only by their Passions; but, to avoid Prolixity, will content myself with the general View I have already presented; and proceed to lay down such Rules as appear to me to tend most directly and securely to the avoiding the various Evils our Children are subject to, and seem most conducive to their real Happiness. But before I lay down any Precepts let me premise, that all Laws in general give Parents the sole supreme Power of governing their Children: ’tis the Order of Nature; and if her Laws are inverted, nothing but Confusion follows. If then Parents do not govern their Children at all; or what is worse, let their Children govern them, which is often the Case, the almost unavoidable Consequence will be, that Train of Irregularities and Disorders we daily see them run into; in which Case, there are but two Ways of their becoming sensible of their mistake: either from a natural Goodness of Heart awakened by Time and Experience; or from a load of Misfortunes crushing them down for want of Power to support them: now the one we ought not to trust to; and the other we should bend all our Study to prevent.
