The meaning of these verses, if we take from them the coarseness of the expressions, which did not perhaps sound so harsh in those times as they would in our days, did not at bottom differ from the well-known line of Pope,
“—Every Woman is at heart a Rake.”
Yet we do not hear that this Poet suffered any flagellation on that account, from the Court Ladies, or any other Ladies; whether it was that he prudently took care, after writing the above line, to keep for some time out of the way, or that the Ladies felt no resentment at the accusation. With respect to Clopinel, however, the case proved otherwise: and whether his expressions really had, notwithstanding what has been above suggested, much the same coarse meaning as now, or Ladies had, in those days, a nicer sensibility to any thing that might touch their honour, the Ladies at Court were much offended at the harsh charge that was thus brought against the whole Sex without distinction: they resolved to make the insolent Poet properly feel the effects of their resentment: and as they were at the same time firmly determined, especially being Court Ladies, not to use any expedient but of an elegant and refined kind, they resolved upon a flagellation. One day, accordingly, as Clopinel was coming to Court, entirely ignorant of the fate that awaited him, the Ladies, who had previously supplied themselves with proper instruments, laid hold of him, and immediately proceeded to make him ready for correction. No possible assistance could rescue Clopinel from having that chastisement served upon him which he so justly deserved, except his wit; which happily did not fail him in so imminent a danger, and suggested to him to ask leave to speak a few words. The favour was granted him, with express injunction, however, to make his story short: when, after acknowledging the justice of the sentence that had been passed upon him, he requested it, as an act of mercy, that that Lady who thought herself most affronted by his lines, should give the first blow: this request struck the Ladies with so much surprise (owing no doubt to the fear every one of them immediately conceived, of giving an advantage against herself for which she might afterwards repent) that, to use the expression of the Author of Moreri’s Dictionary, from which this fact is extracted, the rods fell from their hands, and Clopinel escaped unpunished.
Court Ladies of more modern times, have given similar instances of refinement and elegance in their method of revenging the affronts they had received. On this occasion the Reader may be reminded of the case of the Marchioness of Tresnel, which has been related at length in a former place. Another instance of the justice of Ladies, still more interesting by far, occurred at the Court of Russia about the year 1740. The object of the Ladies resentment, was a Fop of quality, lately returned from his Travels; nor will the Reader question the propriety of the flagellation that was served upon him, when he shall be informed that this presumptuous Spark had been guilty of no less an offence than having publicly boasted of having received favours which had never been shewn him. The fact is related in a Book intitled, Letters from Russia, which was published by a Lady whose husband resided at that Court in a public capacity, between the years 1730 and 1740: the book is written in a pleasing style, and contains a deal of interesting information concerning the Russian Court at that time. The Author, it is said, lived a few years ago at Windsor: her Letters from Russia were addressed to a female friend in England.
In the eleventh letter, the following account is contained. ‘I long to tell you a story; but your prudery (I beg pardon, your prudence) frightens me: however, I cannot resist; so pop your fan before your face, for I am going to begin. We have here a young fellow of fashion, who has made the tour of France, &c. &c. At his return he fell in company with three or four pretty Women at a friend’s house, where he sung, danced, laughed, was very free with the Ladies, and behaved quite a-la-mode de Paris. As he had given the gazing audience a specimen of his airs, so he did not fail afterwards to brag of the fondness of the Ladies for him, and of the proofs they had given him of it. This he repeated in all companies, till it reached the ears of the husbands, who looked glum in silence; and at last, in plain terms, expressed the cause of their ill-humour.’ To abridge the account, it will suffice to say that the Ladies resolved to punish the vain-boasting fop as he deserved: a letter was written to him by one of them, appointing a place where she was to meet him: “he flew on the wings of love to the rendezvous,” perfumed, we are to suppose, and in his smartest dress. Though he expected to meet only one of the Ladies, he found them all four waiting for him; and instead of that delightful afternoon he had prepared himself to spend, he was entertained with a most serious flagellation. ‘Some say (continues the Author who relates this fact) that the Ladies actually whipped him; others, they ordered their maids to do it: that the punishment was inflicted with so much rigour as to oblige him to keep his bed some time, is certain; but whether the Ladies were executioners or spectators only, is a doubt.’
For my own part, I shall be bolder than the fair Author who gives this account; and I will take upon myself to decide that the Ladies were spectators only. Had this young fellow of fashion we are speaking of, committed an offence of no very grievous kind; had he, for instance, been guilty of some word, or even action, moderately indecent in the presence of the Ladies, or affronted them by some ill-timed jokes, or had he, like Clopinel, indulged himself in a bon-mot, or even a whole song, against the honour of the Sex, then we might suppose the Ladies arms, to have possessed sufficient vigour to have served him with a correction proportioned to the degree of his guilt. Not that I consider, however, as some Readers will perhaps do, the falsehood of the facts he had boasted of, as being any aggravation of his offence: very far from it: it is when such facts are true, that the boasting of them is really a fault of a black nature: it is such, in my humble opinion, that no possible flagellation can atone for it; the ungrateful Tell-tale ought to be stitched in a bag, and thrown into the river. However, as the vain speeches of the young fellow were in themselves highly wicked, we are to suppose that the Ladies trusted the care of chastising him to more robustious hands than their own; and we must side with that part of the Public, who thought that they ordered their Maids to perform for them; that is to say, a set of Maid slaves selected among the stoutest of those who composed their housholds, Maids imported from the banks of the Palus-meotis, or the Black Sea, and who thought it a glorious opportunity for shewing their mistresses their zeal in serving them. This supposition agrees extremely well with the ensuing part of the account, viz. that this vain-boasting Coxcomb was obliged to keep his bed some time: who knows? perhaps five or six weeks.
The only personal share, we are to think, the Ladies took in the affair, was, when the execution was concluded, to admonish the culprit as to his future conduct. Milton makes the observation, which is quoted by the Author of the Spectator, that the Devil seemed once to be sensible of shame; it was when he received a censure (unexpected for him, we may suppose) from a young Angel of remarkable beauty. In like manner, what must have been the shame of that young Coxcomb, who perhaps had never blushed in his life, when he heard himself addressed by the Ladies who had caused him to be served with so just a chastisement! what must have been his remorse for his naughty behaviour! his grief in considering, that, had he perhaps waited patiently a little time longer, they would have willingly honoured him with their most valuable favours! The Lady who possessed the easiest and most elegant delivery, advanced towards him a few steps; and, accompanying her short speech with the action of an arm of an exquisite form and hand as white as snow, and with a frown on her face, which, without lessening its beauty, gave a true expression of her just resentment, she made him sensible, in few words, of the greatness of his fault, and the justice of the chastisement that had been administered to him: then turning towards the Calmouk and Tartarian Maids who had so well executed her former orders, she directed them to shew him the way to the street door.
To these instances of the justice of Ladies, we may add those of the corrections they have bestowed upon their husbands; as they have an undoubted right. A very remarkable case of that sort is alluded to, in the I. Canto P. II. of Hudibras.
Did not a certain Lady whip
Of late her husband’s own Lordship?