This is no time to be disheartened. When the sinful lusts rebel, leave them to their disorderly cravings. Let them cry, as a child from whom we take away a dangerous yet pleasing toy. Strengthen yourself for crosses and humiliations. You will soon be made alive in Jesus Christ.
The extraordinary peace you have tasted, is the commencement of the resurrection-life. This peace is not invariable, because the new life is given little by little, yet, I assure you, it will soon fill your whole soul. As God has rapidly advanced inward death, and caused you to run, with a giant step, in the way of self-crucifixion, and this, notwithstanding all the oppositions of the carnal man, he will also thus rapidly advance the resurrection.
The loss, of all things of the earthly life, which follows the resuscitated life, will be deep and extended. The death and burial which precede the resurrection, cannot compare with that total loss, which follows the resuscitated life. This is something different, and in a new state. You will arise from the sepulchre, as the Spouse of the Beloved.
All is consumed in myself, not in the ordinary way, but in a total loss; so that there remains nothing which can be named or known. It seems to me, the death of self is carried almost to infinity, it makes so many unknown steps. Since this morning, this unworthy creature experiences a still greater reduction of self than ever before. Die, live; lose yourself, and find yourself again; then you will have experience of this state.
GRACE DEEPLY INTERIOR.
While you perceive nothing sensible, or apparent, in your religious state, there is, at the same time, evidence to others of a hidden spring of life within your soul. God does not give you the sweet rain which, falling, clothes all the surface of the soul with verdure, but he gives you the deep well-spring, by which means you live and flourish, and produce, not herbs and flowers, which are born and die in the same day, but substantial fruits, ripening for eternity. David said, the life of man upon the earth is as grass, which groweth up in the morning, and withers in the evening. This refers to the natural life, but it is also true of the selfish life of man. It flourishes in the morning of the spiritual life, but no sooner does the sun of righteousness arise in his warmth, than this life withers and is cut down. The righteous are as a tree planted by the rivers of water, whose leaf is always green. This is because the roots are well watered by the deep-flowing current.
God never ceases to operate in your heart. The calm, resigned state of your soul is proof of this.
Take good care of your health. Do not labor beyond your strength. God will abundantly reward you for your labors of love in behalf of others. These are labors he never fails to recompense. I pray God, my dear F., to preserve you for his work. I have many things to say, but I forbear. Your time is precious.