What is most extraordinary indeed is, that while the well-thinking few highly applauded my sensibility, many not only blamed, but publicly derided me for my paternal affection, which was called a weakness, a whim. So extravagant was my joy on this day, however, at having acted the reverse part of Inkle to Yarico, that I became like one frantic with pleasure. I not only made my will in his favour (though, God knows, I had little to dispose of) but I appointed my friends Mr. Robert Gordon and Mr. James Gourlay to be my executors and his guardians during my absence, in whose hands I left all my papers sealed, till I should demand them again, or they should be informed of my death: I then ordered all my sheep, poultry, &c. which had prodigiously encreased, to be transported, and put under their care; and making a new suit of cloaths for the occasion, which cost me twenty guineas, I waited on a Mr. Snyderhans, one of the clergymen at Paramaribo, to appoint a day when my boy, my Johnny Stedman, should be made a Christian[4]. [[373]]
On the 18th Colonel Fourgeoud’s remaining troops at last came down from the encampments at Casseepore Creek, and every preparation was made for our departure. At the same time, the extacy of the few surviving marines at their quitting this country was so great, having now also received part of their clearance, that such intemperance, riot, and disorder ensued as produced the most formidable quarrels between them and the troops of the Society, till, some being wounded and some being flogged, peace was finally, though with difficulty, re-established.
This same day a poor sailor, while I was on board, was drowned in my presence, who fell from the gunwale into the river, with the sheet anchor, which had been neglected to be lashed to the ringbolts. I instantly leaped into a boat to try to save him, but could only get his hat; the man went to the bottom, and never more was seen.
The day of our departure now approached fast, and I gave up my house; when, at Mrs. Godefroy’s pressing invitation, I spent the few remaining moments in that which she had prepared for the reception of Joanna and her boy, in her beautiful garden, charmingly situated under the shade of tamarind and orange trees; which house she also had neatly furnished with every accommodation that could be desired, besides allowing Joanna a negro woman and a girl to attend on her for life. Thus situated, how blest should I have been in this spot to end my days!—But fate ordained it otherwise. [[374]]
On the 22d, I made it my business with Captain Small (who was come down with leave of absence) to wait on the Reverend Mr. Snyderhans, according to appointment, but who, to both our great surprize, peremptorily refused to christen the boy; alledging for his reason, that as I was going to Holland, I could not answer for his christian education. We replied, that he was under two very proper guardians: the blacksmith’s son (for such was this divine) persisted, and we remonstrated, but to no purpose, for he was just as deaf as his father’s anvil, and I believe, upon my soul, quite as empty as his bellows; till at length, wearied out with his fanatical impertinence, I swore that I would sooner see the boy die a heathen, than christened by such a blockhead; while my friend Small could not help bellowing on him a hearty curse, and, slapping the door with a vengeance, we departed.
Feasting and conviviality now prevailed once more at Paramaribo, as on our first arrival. Grand dinners, suppers, and balls were heard of in every quarter. But I only visited a few of my select friends, amongst which number had constantly been Governor Nepveu, and where, for the last time, I made one of the company at a truly magnificent entertainment, which ended the scene of liberality and hospitality, for which the inhabitants of Surinam are so justly conspicuous; and on the 25th the baggage was shipped on board the vessels.
Numberless, indeed, were the presents for the voyage, with which I in particular was now overstocked from every quarter; and my provisions of live cattle, poultry, [[375]]wine, rum, &c. &c. were almost sufficient to carry me round the globe: amongst the rest, in a small bottle case, containing liquors, I found a crystal phial filled with essential oil of orange, and a parcel of what they called here tonquin beans.—The first is extracted from the rind or peel of the oranges: which is done here by the tedious and laborious method of squeezing it between the finger and thumb. A few drops of this on a small piece of sugar, is said to be an excellent remedy to strengthen the stomach, create an appetite, and help digestion; and one single drop smells so strong, that it is sufficient to perfume a whole apartment. The tonquin beans are said to grow in a thick pulp, something like a walnut, and on a large tree. I never saw them otherwise than dried, when they bear some resemblance to a prune or dried plumb, and are made use of to scent snuff and tobacco, to which they impart a most agreeable odour.
On the 26th, we took our last leave of his Excellency the Governor, en corps, as assuredly was his due; after which all the officers of the Society troops waited on Colonel Fourgeoud, at the head quarters, to wish us a prosperous voyage to Holland, and the day was spent by a regale, en militaire, viz. a dinner, as usual, of salt provisions; but I must acknowledge, accompanied with as much good liquor of every kind, as Surinam could furnish, and a very hearty welcome.
I believe that now a hundred times Fourgeoud shook me by the hand, declaring, “That there was not a young [[376]]man he loved better in the world; that had he commanded me to march through fire as well as water, he was convinced I should never have left it, without accomplishing his orders;” with many other fine compliments. But I must candidly acknowledge, that though I had a heart to forgive, my mind would never permit me to forget the many and unnecessary difficulties and miseries to which I had been too wantonly exposed. At the same time he informed me, that he did not propose to depart with us, but intended to follow the regiment very soon, with the remains of the last-come relief, when he would render me every service in his power. Whatever were his real motives for such a sudden change in his disposition towards me, suffice it to say, that few people at this time were better friends, than were the old Colonel Fourgeoud and Captain Stedman.
In the evening I went to take a short farewell of my most valuable acquaintances, such as Mrs. Godefroy, Mr. and Mrs. Demelley, Mr. and Mrs. Lolkens, Mr. and Mrs. Gordon, Mr. Gourlay, Captain Mackneal, Doctor Kissam, &c. who had all (besides Mr. Kennedy and Mr. de Graaf, now gone to Holland) treated me with the most constant and distinguished civility since I had been in the colony: but my soul was too full of a friend that was still dearer, to be impressed with that sensibility on separating from them, that it must have felt on another occasion.—And here I cannot in justice omit remarking, that while I gave the most impetuous vent to my feelings, not the smallest expression of poignant sorrow, or even of dejection, [[377]]escaped from Joanna’s lips; while her good sense and fortitude even restrained the tear from starting in my afflicted presence. I now once more earnestly pressed her to accompany me, in which I was seconded by the inestimable Mrs. Godefroy and all her friends; but she remained equally inflexible, and her steady answer was as before—“That, dreadful as appeared the fatal separation, perhaps never more to meet, yet she could not but prefer remaining in Surinam: first, from a consciousness that, with propriety, she had not the disposal of herself; and, secondly, from pride, wishing in her present condition rather to be one of the first among her own class in America, than a reflection or burthen on me in Europe, as she was convinced must be the case, unless our circumstances became one day more independent.” Here Joanna shewed great emotion, but immediately retired to weep in private.—What could I say or do?—Not knowing how to answer, or sufficiently to admire her firmness and resignation, which so greatly exceeded my own, I determined, if possible, to imitate her conduct, and calmly to resign myself to my fate, preparing for the fatal moment, when my heart forebode me we were to pronounce the LAST ADIEU, and separate for ever.