GROUNDLESS ALARM.

Darling (in straw hat). "WHAT ARE YOU BUYING, DEAR?"

Darling (in black hat). "WHY, I'M BUYING A PUNCH. THE IMPUDENT THING HAS PUT ME IN AS ONE OF HIS GIRLS!"


RATHER A KITCHENY WAY OF PUTTING IT.

Housemaid. "OH—BUT IT COULDN'T A BIN 'ER!"

Cook. "I TELL YER IT WERE—SHE CALLED UPON MISSUS THIS MORNING, AND SHE 'AD ON A PORK PIE 'AT, AND HALF A PHEASANT STUCK IN IT!"

A GEOGRAPHICAL JOKE.