YOUR letter, my dear life, has given me great pleasure. This is indeed, as it ought to be. And Oh by no means suffer this anxious desire after God, this thirst after holiness to abate; only let it be mixed with that kind of resignation, which implies a willingness to suffer, so you may be kept from sin. The pain you speak of I rejoice in. Oh my love, this is right; and may you more and more be conformed to Jesus Christ, and him crucified. A soul thus pained, thus longing, thus struggling for salvation, and at the same time lying low at the foot of the cross, and crying, “Lord thy will be done,” is an object in which the holy angels rejoice, nay on which God himself looks down well pleased. To such a soul every gospel blessing is near at hand. The Sun of Righteousness is on the point of rising in it with healing in his wings; the eternal Comforter is ready to witness with it, that it is born of God, and to fill it with that peace, which passeth all understanding. The blessed and adorable Trinity is ready to raise it from its fallen state, and to perfect the new creation. What encouraging prospects! Only let not this happy pain be taken from you by any comfort the world can give, but hold it dear to your heart, as light to your eyes, till God himself change it to joy unspeakable.
*I have long thought that to wish for any thing, but the salvation of our own souls and that of others is wrong: because in nothing else can we be sure that our wishes are agreeable to the will of God. I do not know how to believe, that you could wish for more riches; and if the being pleased with the thoughts of gain proceeded only from this motive, that you thought God was putting it more in your power to relieve the necessities of others, I would not dare to condemn you: but it is so difficult to take any satisfaction of this kind without some mixture of worldly-mindedness, that we cannot be too careful in this respect; nay we ought rather to fear lest we should not be found faithful stewards of the talents put into our hands, as knowing, that both in spiritual and temporal blessings, “To whom much is given, of them shall much be required.”
My dear Friend,
IF it should please God to make any thing I write of benefit to your soul, I should greatly rejoice, but without that my words will avail nothing. And really the account you give of yourself at present is so strange, that I know not how to speak to you, or whether harshness or love is most necessary. This I know, that my own soul is greatly pained for you, but I dare not flatter you, “If any man hath not the Spirit of Christ, he is none of his;” and doubtless to take a pleasure in exposing the faults of others is a temper as distant from the Spirit of Christ, as hell is from heaven. *Believe me, my dear life, if the love of God reigned in your heart, you would rather cover than expose the faults even of the vilest of men. And when obliged for their own good, or the warning of others, to speak to the disadvantage of any one, you would do it with fear and caution, at the same time looking up to God, lest any bitterness should mix, either with your thoughts or words. God is love, and infinite streams of love are perpetually flowing from him through all created nature. His acts of judgment as well as mercy are only acts of love, and designed either to remove or to lessen the evils occasioned by the fall of angels and of man; and the soul which is born of God will as necessarily partake of this divine principle of universal love, as the child you now carry within you partakes of your corrupt nature. You have great reason then to tremble, while this temper has any footing in your soul. Don’t sit down contented, because you have intervals of recollection, but wrestle mightily with God in fervent prayer, until he speak peace to your soul, and his love be shed abroad in your heart, before which this evil disposition will fly as a mist before the morning sun. You greatly affect me by what you say in regard to the expected hour of danger; but fear not. No creature on earth can be more unworthy than I am; and the God of mercy protected me, and gave me strength, and courage, and calmness; and I doubt not but he will shew the same mercy to you: nay I have a strong confidence he will in your hour of extremity give you a clearer sense of his pardoning love, than you have yet experienced. Fear not, only believe, “All things are possible to him that believeth.”
It has pleased God within these few days to give me a severe trial, and eternal glory be to his name, I have stood it, crying only, Lord, thy will be done. My little boy was taken on Saturday evening with strong convulsions, and between that time and Sunday evening, had I believe, full forty fits. He is now much better. God is ever merciful: he brings to the borders of the grave, and raises up again. O how good it is to suffer? How glorious to have grace triumph over nature? How sweet to lay low at the foot of the cross, and bless God for every thing which more conforms us to the suffering Jesus? Be watchful, and earnest. Adieu.
My dear Friend,
*WHERE the consideration of the prophecies is a means of stirring any one up to greater diligence, or making them sit looser to the things of this world, and seek more earnestly after the things of God, they cannot consider them too attentively. Every soul should carefully observe that way, in which God particularly leads it, and punctually follow every means which it finds by experience brings it nearer to God. Some are awakened and brought low by meditating on the severe judgments of God; others are melted down by reflecting on his mercies. Some are employed usefully to themselves, and it may be to others, by accurately considering the several amazing dispensations of God in the whole scheme of our redemption. Others by a more simple and general view of God, as infinite wisdom and infinite love, rest calmly on his will, and though in a lower and less shining way, pursue the same end, viz. salvation by the blood of the Lamb from the power as well as from the guilt of sin, and union with the pure fountain of all happiness. All these ways are good in themselves, and are made so to every soul, which in them follows the leadings of the Spirit of God. But I may make that, which is good in itself, evil to me, by using it only because another thinks it right, and not because I find it the means which most unites my soul to Christ; and therefore we ought never to blame any one for not being affected by that which affects us.
’Tis very certain that the judgments of God are now abroad in the earth, and that some of the signs of the last times plainly appear; this (whether the calculation in the letter be right or wrong) is obvious to every one, and calls aloud for seriousness and watchfulness. Happy are those who shall stand unmoved in the time of temptation. Happy are those who when all nature is agonizing around them can fly to the only rock of refuge, and there find shelter from the storm, and shadow from the heat. But above all happy are those, who shall have the glory of suffering for their Redeemer, of sealing their testimony with their blood, or in the midst of the fire shouting for joy, and blessing God for a martyr’s crown. These, these are glorious prospects, and weak as we are, should God honour us with a trial like this, he would also give us strength to be more than conquerors. In the mean time let us not be weary or faint in our minds, but manfully fight till we obtain complete victory over our evil hearts; and then shall we stand with humble confidence even before our judge, and though all nature was dissolved, we should remain unshaken, and be wholly swallowed up in joy full of glory. Amen, Lord Jesus.