“The balmy sound drank in,
And was at once made whole.”
I staid at the bands as I could not go home by myself, and my aunt chose to stay. I experienced that it was good for me to be there, for my soul was exceedingly blest. Lord make me truly thankful for this, and all thy other mercies daily conferred upon me, the chief of sinners.
Tuesday, October 1. In the evening I found my soul quickened under religious conversation, and continued so all Wednesday and Thursday, having great enlargement in prayer, and free access to the throne; blessed be God.
Monday 14. My mind was in a serious frame most part of this day. In the evening we had a comfortable love-feast, at which my soul was much comforted, and found a great wrestling and agonizing for the blessing.
Saturday 19. I was rather cold all day, but glory be to God, I had great enlargement in prayer, especially in the evening.
Sunday 20. Mr. M——r preached on Matthew v. 22, 26. Agree with thine adversary quickly, &c. He earnestly exhorted and intreated every one to agree with God by forsaking their sins and turning to him, lest he should swear in his wrath, they should not enter into his rest. The word came with power to my soul, and I felt a resolution never to rest, till I had made my peace with God. O may the Lord confirm it, or it will be like the morning cloud.
Monday 21. I arose this morning with an earnest desire, and a determination by the grace of God to give myself up to him. O may I never, never rest, till I fully rest in him.
Tuesday 22. My soul was in a serious frame, but in the evening I gave so much way to an inordinate desire after a foolish thing, that my mind was quite drawn off from God. When I went to bed, I was greatly humbled, and ashamed on account of it, and I trust I shall never so yield again to the enemy of my soul.
Wednesday 30. I was in a very indifferent state all the day, but in the evening in class-meeting I was much quickened, and stirred up by a young person’s giving an account, how she found peace the day before in private prayer. I was, and am still determined by the grace of God never to rest till I also find him whom my soul desires to love. My soul continued much blest all the evening, and I dropt asleep with earnest desires to be brought into that glorious liberty of the sons of God. Dearest Jesus, how long will it be before thou wilt manifest thyself to me, as thou dost not unto the world? O come and take up thine abode in my longing heart, and live and reign in me without a rival.