Falling in luv, iz like falling down stairs.—we never kan tell exackly how the thing waz did.=
In haste, Josh Billings
Q.–Deskribe old maids.
A.–Embers from which the sparks hav fled.
Our hero soon found out a place,
With a farmer, kind hearted indeed,
Who let him ho corn for nothing,
And only charged John for his feed.
THE YANKEE PEDLAR.
Probably the sharpest man that the world haz been blest with thus far iz the natral born Yankee pedlar. He takes to the bizzness just az handy az a yung duk takes to the water, who haz been hatched out by mistake amung a lot ov hen's eggs. He kan see just whare the proffit lies in a dicker, and aint afrade to invest hiz whole pile, at a minnitt's notiss, in an assorted lot ov goose yokes. He begins life yung, and like the bizzy ant, gits up arly, and eats on the run. Az long az he keeps honest he iz sure to sukceed, but sumtimes hiz genius iz too mutch for hiz integrity, and every boddy gits to be az frade ov him, az they are ov a hornet. The hornet iz the smartest bug in kreashun, but haint got no friends. The world luvs to be cheated, but they want to hav it dun bi an honest man, and not bi a hornet, and then they never seem to git tired ov it. I hav seen Yankee pedlars who allwus cheated every boddy they traded with, but they allwuss did it so honest, and square, that every boddy seemed to be happy when their turn cum. But the old fashioned Yankee pedlar, with his little red painted kart, and bobtail pony, like the letterings on the mile stuns, iz fast fading away.