A cold-blooded philosphick lektur is just az eazy az turning a grinstone: the aujence are obliged tew hold their hatchets on, and they are sure tew git ground out after a while: but you kant tell a man when tew laff; he knows what pleazes him, just az well az he knows what eats good; yu kant play a burnt slapjack, nor one that ain't well dun, onto him.
Thar ain't nothing more straining tew a humorist than tew have tew stop and explane a joke.
I hav just got hum from Boston: i put 2 spokes into the hub at Tremont Temple the two fust nights in Febuary: I lektured 15 nights in Massachewsetts.
I don't kno whether it waz a success or not: awl i kno iz i felt good myself.
Humurous lekturs, without the aid ov canvass or pantomime, are tuff tew do.
I think now i shall either git up a philosophicall lektur on the culler ov the Red Sea, or the hump ov the cammel's back, or quit lekturing.
I kan steal a good philosophicall lektur out ov sum library; but these cussed humurous lekturs hav so mutch original in them (or ought to hav) that yu kant kalkulate on them for certain—they are like twins, they kant be had nor they kant be stopped.
Upon the whole, az near az i kan guess, mi opinyun iz that humor iz a natral dissease, that a man kant ketch nor kant giv tew ennyboddy else.
XIV.