WISDUM CHUNCKS.
The best time ov the moon to plant beans iz when—the grownd iz aul rite.
Slovens are always the fust tew caul our attenshun tew their slovenness, by their exkewses for it.
Don't tawk so mutch, my friend! Yu don't kno but little, and ort tew be saving ov it.
Book critiks shood be treeted az the farmers do their swine—rung, and then turned out to critysize.
The man with little branes, and the man with little ammunishun, shood hunt alike; they shood take ame a good while, and then always shut, into a flock. Avoyd single burds.
Deer reeder, don't find fawlt with an awthur who makes yu laff; it is no more an evidence of weekness to laff than it iz ov strength tew look mad.
Menny ov the enormittys ov life have bin committed in the name ov religun—enormittys that make h—l blossom like the rose.
Bewty never dies; it iz like truth; they both hav an immortality sumwhare.
I hav got a fust rate opinyun ov resignashun, but i don't think enny man iz in dewty bound to thank the Lord every time sum careless cuss steps on hiz soar tow.