When mice hav reached their manhood, their tales are just the same length az their boddys. This would seem at fust sight tew be a grate waste ov tail.
The philosophik mind, ever at work, applying means tew ends, might be a bigg phool enuff tew want to know whi a bob-tailed mouse wouldn’t be a better finished job; but philosophy haz no bizzness tew alter things to suit the market. It must take mouse-tails just az they cum, and either glorify them, or shut up.
If there want ennybody in the natral philosophy trade, i hav thought it would be jist as well for natur bekause a man, if he kant orthodox a reason for the entire length ov a mouse’s tale iz often willing tew tell hiz nabors that the whole critter iz a failure.
Sutch iz man; but a mouse iz a mouse.
The mouse kan live ennywhare tew advantage, except in a church. They phatt very slow in a church. This goes tew show that they kant live on religion enny more than a minister kan. Religion iz excellent for digestion.
Thare aint a more prolifick thing on earth (prolifick ov fun i mean now) than a mouse in a distrikt school-house. They are better than a fire-cracker tew stir up a school-marm with, and are just the things tew throw spellin books at when they are on the run.
One mouse will edukate a parcell ov yung ones more in ten minnitts during school time than you can substrakt out ov their heds in three days with Daballs arithmetik.
Now thare iz many folks who kant see enny thing to write about in a mouse; but mice are full ov informashun. The only way that edukashun was fust discovered waz bi going tew 110 school to natur. Books, if they are sound on the goose, are only natur in tipe.
A grate many kontend that a mouse iz a useless kritter; but kan they prove it?
I am willing to give an opinyun that too menny mice might not pay; but this applies to musketoze, elephants, and side-wheel steambotes.