Az for me, thare iz only one piece (thus far) ov vital creation, that i aktually hate, and that iz a bed-bugg. I simply dispize snaiks, fear musketoze, avoid fleas, don’t associate with the cockroach, go around toads, back out square for a hornet.
Nevertheless, moreover, to wit, i must say, even at this day of refinement, and bell letters, i do aktually luv to stand on tip-toe, and see a romping, red-cheeked, blew-eyed boy, chased up stairs and then down stair, and then out in the garden, and finally caught and throwed, and held firmly between hiz mother’s kneeze, and see an old, warped, fine-toothed horn comb go and come, half buried through a flood ov lawless hair, and drag each trip to the light, a fat and lively louse—and, 186 in conclusion, to hear him pop as mother pins him with her thum nail fast tew the center ov the comb, fills me chuck up to the brim with something, i don’t know what the feeling iz; perhaps sumboddy out ov a job can tell me.
KATS.
A kat iz sed to hav 9 lives, but i beleaf they dont hav but one square deth.
It iz allmost unpossible to tell when a kat iz ded without the aid ov a koroners jury.
I hav only one way miself to judge ov a ded kat.
KATS.
If a kat iz killed in the fall ov the year, and thrown over the stun wall into yure nabors lot, and lays thare all winter 187 under a sno bank, and dont thaw out in the spring, and keeps quiet during the summer months, and aint missing when winter sets in agin, I have alwus sed, that, ‘that kat,’ waz ded, or waz playing the thing dredful fine.
Speaking ov kats, mi opinyun iz, and will continue to be, that the old-fashioned kaliko-coulered kats iz the best breed for a man ov moderate means, who haint got but little munny to put into kats.