If thare iz enny boddy who hain’t never been bit bi a hum bugg yet, he must be sumboddy who has always staid at home with his uncle, and, lived on bread and milk, or was born numb all the way through, and couldn’t feel any kind ov a bite.
If i should hear a man brag that one ov these bugs couldn’t bite him, I should set him down at once for a man who wan’t a good judge ov the truth. The bite of a hum bugg iz wuss than a hornet’s, and always different from a dog’s, for the dog growls, and then bites, but the hum bugg bites, and lets you do the growling.
THE BUGG BEAR.
Natral History has its myths and its ghosts, az well az enny boddy else, and foremost among these iz—the bugg bear.
The bugg bear iz born from an imaginary egg, and iz hatched by an imaginary process.
They are like a shadow in the afternoon, always a good deal bigger than the thing that casts it.
They are compozed ov two entirely different animals, the bugg and the bear, but generally turn out to be pretty much all bug.
They are like the assetts on a bankrupt broker, the more you examine them, the smaller they grow.
I have known them tew cum out ov a hole like a mice, and grow in tew minnits az big az an elephant, and then run back agin into the same hole they cum out ov.
They are like a young wild pigeon in their habits, the biggest when they are first born.