If a man haz got too much snaik in him, he iz liable tew overdo things, and if he haz got too mutch duv in him, he aint apt tew cook things enuff.
The duv iz a homemade kritter; they are as effeckshionate as a cockroach iz.
The nearer they kan liv tew whare man duz, the more they are apt tew do it.
Lams and duvs hav a grate menny weak points; but i wouldn’t like enny better phun than tew liv whar thare want ennything else but duvs and lams. But this place aint laid down on enny of the maps in this world.
Hawks and wolfs hav made the duv and lam trade dredful unsartin.
I guess, after all, that the evil things in this life help tew make the good things more desirable, and all things that are natral must be right, be they lam, duv, wolf or sarpient.
THE OLD BACHELOR.
A chronick old bachelor iz invaribly ov the nuter gender, i don’t care how mutch he may offer tew bet that it ain’t so.
They are like dried apples on a string, want a good deal ov soaking before they will do to use.
I suppose thare iz sum ov them who hav a good excuse for their nuterness; menny ov them are too stingy tew marry; this iz one ov the best excuses i kno ov, for a stingy man ain’t fit to hav a nice woman.