Ans.—Giv me 10 dollars and i will tell you. But here is a recipee that i giv away. Bring up your boy in fear ov the rod and a gin mill.
Qu.—Iz thare enny kure for natral laziness, whare it iz a part ov a man’s constitushun and bye laws?
Ans.—Only one kure, that iz, milk a cow on the run, and subsist on the milk.
Qu.—How fast duz sound travel?
Ans.—This depends a good deal upon the natur ov the noize yu are talking about. The sound ov a dinner horn for instance travels a half a mile in a seckond, while an invitashun tew git up in the morning I hav known to be 3 quarters ov an hour going up two pair ov stairs, and then not hav strength enuff left tew be heard.
WHISSLING.
I hav spent a grate deal ov sarching, and sum money, tew find out who waz the first whissler, but up tew now i am just az mutch uncivilized on the subjekt az i waz.
I kan tell who played on the first juice harp, and who beat the fust tin pan, and i kno the year the harp ov a thousand 70 strings waz diskovered in, but when whissling waz an infant, iz az hard for me tew say, az mi prayers in lo dutch.
WHISSLING.