Most evrybody thinks they kan keep a hotel (and they kan), but this ackounts for the grate number ov hotels that are kept on the same principle that a justiss ov the peace offiss iz kept in the country during a six-days’ jury trial for killing sumboddy’s yello dorg.
A hotel wont keep itself and keep the landlord too, and ever kure a traveler from the habit ov profane swareing.
I hav had this experiment tried on me several times, and it alwus makes the swares, wuss.
It iz too often the kase that landlords go into the bizzness ov hash az ministers go into the professhun, with the very best ov motives, but the poorest kind ov prospecks.
I dont know ov enny bizzness more flattersum than the tavern bizzness, there dont seem to be ennything to do but to stand in front ov the register with a pen behind the ear and see that the guests enter themselfs az soon az they enter the house, then yank a bell-rope six or seven times, and then tell John to sho the gentleman to 976, and then take four dollars and fifty cents next morning from the poor devil ov a traveler and let him went.
This seems to be the whole thing (and it iz the whole thing) in most cases.
Yu will diskover the following deskripshun a mild one, ov about 9 hotels out ov 10 between the Atlantik and Pacifick Oshuns akrost the United States in a straight line:
Yure room iz 13 foot 6 inches, by 9 foot 7 inches, parallelogramly.
It being court week (az usual), all the good rooms are employed bi the lawyers and judges.