He waz a most gifted pup, and could jerk a night-gown oft from a clothes line, or worry a goose, most butiful tew behold.
He waz a bul pup, but iz no more.
Tiger waz hiz fust name.
I hav made up mi mind never to own enny more dog.
Dog comfort, in this world iz, like all other joy, liable to leak.
Human happiness iz skase enny how, and wants too mutch watching, to be invested in dorgs.
JOSH SETTLES UP WITH HIS CORRESPONDENTS SUMMARILY.
“Philander.”—If yu borrow ov the Devil, yu must keep yure eye peeled wide open, for the Devil always takes a mortgage, and seldum takes one, that he fails tew foreclose.
“Plato.”—Mi experience, az far az i have got, iz this, that i kan most alwus find out the style ov milk in enny man’s moral kokernutt, by hearing hiz opinion ov hiz nearest nabors, for men are quite apt tew dam in others, what they hav got the most ov themselfs, and praze what they have got the least ov.
“Pindar.”—The strongest sentiment in woman iz modesty, and the next strongest iz a silk dress, made in the fashion. The strongest sentiment in man iz money, and the next strongest iz 10 per cent. for the use ov it.