The same is true of the class of young ladies who know something of music, vocal and instrumental. They can dance. They have studied drawing sufficiently to be able to sketch a few flowers and figures. Perhaps they can speak French and translate German. They know in what position to sit, and how to move gracefully. All very well these things in their places, and fitted to increase the charm of manner when the eyes are lighted up by the informing soul; not undeserving notice either in their influence upon man, when they are accompanied by something better, for, amid all the weighty cares of life, he is sometimes in the mood when such things do please; but sadly over-estimated when they are made the sole substance and end of a woman's education. They might nearly all be done by a being without a soul. They do nothing to draw out the noble qualities of her deep womanly nature. They leave her altogether unfitted for her peculiar mission of a wife and mother.
Now, there are times when a woman, despite her imperfect education, acquires after marriage the knowledge which fits her for the duties appertaining to wifehood. But where nature yields to such training, the woman fails both in filling her sphere and in fulfilling her mission, and falls beneath her true position as the helpmeet of man. How bitter his disappointment, who, having been smitten by these gewgaw attractions, and having put faith in the mother of the child that with this outward attraction she had corresponding qualifications to fill the home with helpful counsel and sustaining sympathy, when he comes to find that, instead of a wife, he has married a plaything, and that his children are being committed to the care of a helpless, unformed companion, rather than to the guidance of a true and noble wife.
A proper conception of woman's mission as the helpmeet of man would tend greatly to her elevation. A man who knows for what woman has been made, and what advantage he should look for from the woman whom he calls wife, will not select a mere toy as the partner of his life; and when woman properly recognizes her place, mothers will not be content to give their daughters, nor will daughters be ambitious, or even content to receive only such a training as fits them for amusing or pleasing man in his playful hours, but leaves them altogether unfit to be his companion under the weightier cares and graver concerns of life.
Let it be understood that woman's life and labor, mission and work, point ever homeward, and whether she serve in the store or shop, in the factory or in the home, she will be ready, whenever God's providence opens the way, to make home bright for another, because it has been made bright for herself. In her reading, in her planning, in her waking dreams and in her night visions, let her live to make her own home joyous, and she will not live in vain. To do this successfully in the future, she must make home bright and beautiful in the present. It is the girl, whose hand is skilful in the home, who is prized as a companion, because of the substantial linked with the ornamental. The same is true of a man. Talent, genius even, is valueless unless it can earn bread. There must be something to make home pleasant with, which it is the duty of man to provide, else woman finds it hard to do her work or fulfil her mission. This does not disparage woman. Her intellect should not be regarded as inferior to man's because it differs from his. Her mind is formed for a distinct work and sphere, just as truly as is her body. In that sphere she is endowed with faculties superior to that of man. Here she has her requital: here she proves herself mistress of the field, and employs those secret resources which might be termed admirable, if they did not inspire a more tender sentiment, both towards her, and towards God, who has so richly endowed her. "Her practical survey, equally sure and rapid; her quick and accurate perception; her wonderful power of penetrating the heart in a way unknown and impracticable to man; her never-failing presence of mind, and personal attention on all occasions; her numerous and fertile resources in the management of her domestic affairs; her ever ready access and willing audience to all who need her; her freedom of thought and action in the midst of the most agonizing sufferings and accumulated embarrassments; her elasticity,—may I say her perseverance,—in spite of feebleness; her tact to practise it, were it not instinctive; her extreme perfection in little things; … her incomparable skill in re-awakening a sleeping conscience, in re-opening a heart that has long been closed; in fine, innumerable are the things which she accomplishes, and which man can neither discern nor offset without the aid of her eye and hand. Thus, mentally as well as physically, is she predestined for a work and sphere different from those of her stronger companions. And, as everything is beautiful in its place and season, so is woman most beautiful and useful when, like a modest flower, she blooms in the privacy for which her nature fits her, and perfumes, with the fragrance of her character, the hallowed precincts of home."[A] "No man," says Mr. Jay, "was ever proof against the kindness of a sensible woman; but where, in all history, can an instance be produced in which an ascendency over him has been obtained by forwardness, scolding, and strife for preeminence? No wife has such influence with, or even such control over, her husband, as
"'She who never answers till her husband cools,
Or, if she rules him, never shows she rules;
Charms by accepting, by submission sways,
Yet has her humor most when she obeys.'"
[Footnote A: Woman's Sphere and Work, by Rev. Wm. Landels, D.D.,
London.]
2. Woman's mission is social as well as domestic. The domestic part of her life is the garden, in which the seed is planted, which brings forth the flower of social joy. A woman who is the soul of a beautiful home is a power in society. No matter what her talents may be, let it be known that she is a slattern at home, and she is without influence. The pen may serve as a feather to adorn her social life, but it looks mean when the use of it causes the neglect of the needle.
Woman may be a secret power in the home. She may make home attractive to the refined and cultured, and thus prove to be the magnet attracting to herself and to her fireside those gifted sons and daughters, the scintillations of whose genius and the dissemination of whose beautiful thoughts make the home luminous with a light which is inextinguishable. The influence of such a woman over her children and over the young cannot be overestimated.
"Such a sphere, so far from being insufficient to satisfy a true woman's ambition, is well fitted, by its tremendous responsibilities, to excite her fears. There is not one, perhaps, which a human being can occupy, on which hang more stupendous issues. Though less public, it is still more potential than man's."
The influence of a true woman cannot be confined to the home. Home is the fountain, and the world gladly furnishes channels for the diffusion of her influence. In promoting the cause of reform, in alleviating the woes of the unfortunate, in carrying forward the cause of temperance, in ministering to the sick, either as a nurse or a physician, in using her pen to delight and guide the thoughts of the young and old along the garden paths of her own loving life, thick with the blossoms of hope, and made glorious by deeds of charity,—in these, and in numberless other ways, woman, finding her throne in the house, is welcomed as a ruler in the world.