Nearly all the inhabitants of Parasiteville are, may it be no evil omen to you, nothing but poor people and quite destitute. But the truth must be told, they are merry beggars, joyful mendicants, possessed of unbounded hope. If one, for example, suddenly asks a Parasiteville Jew where and how he manages to make a living, he stops at first bewildered, and does not know what to answer, but after a while he collects himself and answers in good spirits: I, how I make a living, I? Well, there is a God, I tell you, you see, who does not abandon His creatures; He sends us a living and will no doubt continue to send us, I tell you!—After all, what is your occupation? Have you some kind of trade that you ply, or have you some kind of income?—Praised be the Lord! I have, thanks to the Lord, as you see me, a gift from Him, a good voice, and I lead the prayers of the Mussafim on the great holidays
un' dawen' Mussofim Jomim-nōrojim in der Swiwe; ich bin a Mohel un' a Maze-rädler, Ēiner in der Welt; ich führ' a Māl aus a Schidech, führ' ich aus. Ich hāb' a Stāat, wie ihr kuckt mich ān, ot-o, in der Schul'; heunt halt' ich äuch, zwischen uns soll es bleiben, a Schēnkel, wās melkt sich zu bisslich; ich hāb' a Zieg', wās melkt sich ohn' Anore sēhr gut, un' hāb' nischt weit vun danneu a reichen Korew, ot-o, wās lāst sich unter a schlechter Zeit äuch a Bissel melken. Heunt, chuz die alle Sachen, sāg' ich euch ot-o, is' Gott a Tate un' die Jisroejel senen Rachmonim-bnee-rachmonim, sāg' ich euch ot-o, nischt zu varsündigen!...
Äuch mus män die Tunejadewker Einwōhner dem Schwach nāchsāgen, as see seneu zufrieden mit wās Gott gi't un' klauben cholile in der Halbosche un' in dem Essen stark nischt über. As die schabesdige Kapote, a Stēiger, is' zuhackt, zufallen, zurissen, a Bissel varschlumpert un' eppes nischt asō rēin, macht äuch nit aus, abi sie is' fort vun Atlas un' glanzt. Ai örterweis kuckt wie vun a Reschete araus dās hōhle Leib, meele wās art es wemen? Wer wet sich dā asō stellen zukucken? Lemai Pjates, mit wās is' dās ärger vun ausgerissene Pjates? Pjates is' denn nischt kēin Leib, kēin Menschenflēisch?...
A Stückel Brōt mit a Kolisch, abi 's is' nor dā, is' sēhr a guter Mittāg. Wer schmuest a Bulke mit a Rosselflēisch Freitāg, wer es hāt nor,—dās is' take a Maichel-Mecholim, kēin Besseres dervun is' schōn, dacht sich, auf der Welt nischt dā. Lās män see derzaehlen, a Stēiger, vun andere Minee Potrawes chuz Fischjauch, Gebrāten's un' a Mähren-oder Posternakzimmes, kummt see dās aus eppes meschune wild un' sāgen darauf āb varschiedene Wörtlich mit dem grössten Gelächter, gleich wie der, wās sāgt es, is' narrisch,
in the towns hereabout; I am a Mohel and a roller of matzoth, an expert in my work; I sometimes make a match and get people married. I have a pew in the synagogue, although you may not think it of me; besides I have a grog-shop, between us be it said, that brings me in a little income; I have a goat that gives a great deal of milk, and not far from here I have a rich relative who in bad times lets himself be milked a little too. Besides all these things, I tell you, God is a father and the Jews are the recipients of His mercy, I tell you, and may we not sin against Him!...
We must give the inhabitants of Parasiteville their due,—they are contented with anything God may give them, and they are not by any means dainty in their garments and their food. If, for example, the Sabbath coat is all crushed, threadbare, and torn, a little bedraggled and of questionable cleanliness, that does not trouble them much, provided it is of satin and has a sheen. You will say that in places the bare body looks out of it as from a sieve! What of that? Whose concern is it? Who will stop to look at it inquisitively? Is that at all worse than bare heels? Are heels no body, no human flesh?...
A piece of bread with a buckwheat cake, if only it can be procured, is a very good dinner indeed. And just think of a white roll with some braized meat on a Friday! Whoever can get that, regards it as the finest dainty, better than which, it seems, nothing can be found in the world. Let anybody tell of any other kinds of choice dishes than fish juice, roast meat, and carrot or parsnip scallop, he will be looked upon as a madman, and they will make all kinds of jests about him and burst out in loud laughter, as if he who had
meschuge un' will see äuch machen meschuge, einrēden see a Kind in Bauch, a Kuh is' geflōgen über'n Dach un' gelēgt an Ēi. A Stückel Bockser in Chamischo-ossor dās is' asa Peere, wās is' mechaje Nefosches; kuckendig derauf dermāhnt män sich in Erzesrojel, nischt ēin Māl varglotzt män derbei die Äugen mit a Krächz: Ach, "wessōlicheenu kōmmius," sollst uns, harzediger Vāter, führen kōmmius, take was kōmmius hēisst, "learzeenu"—zu unser Land, wās Ziegen essen dort Bocksern!... Al-pi Mikre hāt Ēiner a Māl in dem Städtel gebracht a Tēitel, hā't ihr bedarft sehn, wie asō män is' dās geläufen ānkucken auf Chidesch! Män hāt aufgemischt a Chumesch un' gewiesen, as "Tomer" der Tēitel stēht in Chumesch! Steutsch, der Tēitel, ot der Tēitel wachst doch vun Erzesrojel!... Kuckendig auf'n Tēitel, hāt sich ausgedacht, Erzesrojel is var die Äugen, ot gēht män über dem Jarden, ot is' die Meoras-hamachpeelo, der Mutter Rochel's Keewer, dās Kōssel-maarowi, ot bādt män sich in Chamee-te-warjo, män kriecht arauf auf'n Har-haseessim, män esst sich ān mit Bocksern, mit Tēitlen, un' män lēgt ān fulle Keschenjes mit Erzesrojel-erd'. Ach, hāt män gekrächzt, un' in die Äugen hāben Itlichen sich gestellt Trähren. "Jene Zeit," asō sāgt Binjāmin, "is' ganz Tunejadewke, wie grōss sie is', gewe'n in Erzesrojel. Män hāt geschmack geredt vun Moschiach'n, ot, ot, is' schōn Gott's Freitāg noch halben Tāg.... Der neuer Pristaw, wās is' nischt lang āngekummen, hāt grād be-jod-romo denstmāl geführt dās Städtel. Bei a Pāar Jüden hāt er arābgerissen die Jarmelkes, Ēinem ābgeschnitten a Peje, Etliche nebech gechappt spät bei der Nacht in a Gässel ohn' Pasporten, bei noch Ēinem varnummen a Zieg', wās hāt aufgegessen a neuem