A man or woman unable to accept an invitation, extended by a hostess to whom he or she is a stranger, is obligated to leave cards within two weeks after the entertainment. Similarly, the guests, men and women, invited to the ceremony of a church wedding, leave cards for the bride's mother within two weeks after the wedding. Even though one is a stranger to the mother, this card must be left as a matter of courtesy and social obligation. People who receive cards announcing a marriage are also expected to leave cards for the mother of the bride. A friend of the groom who is a stranger to the bride and her family, and who finds that he is unable to attend the ceremony to which he has been invited, need not pay a call, but must leave a card for the bride's mother a week or two after the wedding.
Other occasions requiring card-leaving are those inquiries regarding the health and condition of a friend; sympathy and good feeling in the event of some misfortune; condolence; congratulation; and upon announcing a prolonged absence from, or a reëntrance into, society. A change of address is also usually made known by means of card-leaving.
© Brown Bros.
DECORATIONS FOR A WEDDING IN A SMALL CHURCH
In a simple church such as the one pictured above the ribbon at the end of the pews may be omitted]
If one is invited to an afternoon or evening reception, and finds it impossible to attend, cards should be sent either by mail or messenger, so that they reach the hostess on the day of her entertainment. If the cards are sent by hand or by post, they should be enclosed in a card envelope, sealed, and addressed to the host and hostess—provided, of course, that both of their names appear on the invitation. If the affair is in honor of some special person a card is left for or sent to that person in addition to the one for the hostess.
If posted cards of regret are sent by a single woman, she includes one for the débutante or for the guest of honor, in addition to the one enclosed for the hostess. The married woman adds to these two, three more of her husband's. A single man, under the same circumstances, sends three of his cards if the reception is given in honor of a débutante or a guest of honor (masculine or feminine), and if the invitation was issued in the name of a host and hostess.
One may send cards of inquiry, congratulation and condolence by post or messenger, only if one is indisposed, invalided, or inconveniently situated at a great distance from the persons addressed. It is always better form to pay these calls in person, and leave the cards oneself. However, the cards of inquiry, congratulation and condolence may all be acknowledged by post or messenger, as one desires.
LEAVING CARDS OF INQUIRY