I think there cannot be a better Representation of Hell than these sort of Kitchins, and the Persons in them; for not to speak of this horrible Smoak, which blinds and choaks one, they are a Dozen of Men, and as many Women, blacker than Devils, nasty and stinking like Swine, and clad like Beggars. There are always some of ’em impudently grating on a sorry Guitar, and singing like a Cat a roasting. The Women have all of ’em their Hair about their Ears, and you would take ’em for Bedlamites; they have Glass Necklaces, which hang twisted about their Necks like Ropes of Onions, but however serve to cover the Nastiness of their Skin. They are as great Thieves as any are in Jayls, and they are urgent to serve you only to have an opportunity to steal something of you, though it be but a Pin.
Before all things, the Mistress of the House brings you her little Children, who are bareheaded in the midst of Winter, though but of a Day old: she makes ’em touch your Cloaths, she rubs their Eyes with them, their Cheeks, Throat, and Hands. This seems as if one was become a Relick, and could heal all Diseases. These Ceremonies over, you are askt, If you will eat any thing; and though at Mid-night, you must send to the Butchery, the Market, the Tavern, the Bakers; in fine, to all parts of the Town, to gather wherewith to make a sorry Meal. For though the Mutton here be very tender, their way of frying it with Oyl, is not to every Bodies Relish. Here are great store of Partridges, and those very large; they are not very fat, but dry; and to make ’em drier, they roast ’em to a Coal. The Pidgeons here are excellent; and in several places here is good Fish, especially Bessugosses, which have the taste of a Trout, and of which they make Pasties, which would be good, were they not stuff’d with Garlick, Saffron, and Pepper. Their Bread is white enough, and sweet, that one would think it made up with Sugar; but it is ill wrought, and so little baked, that it is as heavy as Lead in the Stomach: it has the shape of a flat Cake, and is not much thicker than one’s finger. The Wine is good, and Fruits in their season, especially Grapes, which are very large, and of delicate taste. You may reckon yourself certain of a good Desart. You have Sallads here of such good Lettice as the World cannot afford better.
Do not think (Dear Cousin) ’tis sufficient to say, Go fetch such things, to have them; for not very seldom you can meet with nothing: But supposing you find what you would have, you must give out your Money beforehand: so that your Meat is paid for before you have begun to eat it; for the Master of the Inn is only allowed to Lodge you: they alledge for a Reason, That it is not just one only Person should go away with all the Profit from Travellers, it being better the Money should be dispersed.
You enter not any Inn to Dine, but carry your Provision with you, and stop at the Bank of some River, where the Mule-Drivers bate their Mules; and this is with Oats or Barley, with chopt Straw, which they carry with them in great Sacks; for as to Hay they give ’em none. It is not allow’d a Woman to tarry above two Days in an Inn on the Road, unless she can offer good Reasons. And here’s enough in relation to Inns, and the Manner of your Treatment therein.
After Supper these Gentlemen play’d at Ombre, and I not being strong enough to play against them, I went shares with Don Frederic de Cardonne; and Don Fernand drew near the Fireside to me; he told me, He could have wisht my time would permit me to pass by Vailladolid; that it is the most pleasant Town of Old Castille, it having been for a great while the Mansion of the Kings of Spain; and that they have a Palace there fit for them. That as to him, he had Relations there would be infinitely pleased to Entertain me; and would shew me the Dominicans Church, which the Dukes of Lerma have founded; that it was very Stately, and the Portal of singular Beauty, by means of the Figures and Embossed Work, which enrich it: That in the Colledge of the same Convent the French see there with great satisfaction, all the Walls full of Flower de Luces; it being said, a Bishop who depended on the King of France, had been at the Charge of Painting them. He added, They would have carried me to the Religioses of St. Claire, to shew me in the Choir of their Church, the Tomb of a Castillan Knight, whence ’tis said, issues out Accents and Groans every time any of his Family are near their Deaths. I smiled at this, as being doubtful of the Truth of such kind of Relations: ‘You give not Credit to what I say,’ continued he, ‘neither would I engage for the Truth of it, though all the Country thereabouts are so fully perswaded of it, that you would be suspected for an Heretick should you question it. But it is certain there is a Bell in Arragon, in a small Town call’d Villilla, on the Ebre, which is about fifty Foot compass, and it happens sometimes to sound of itself, it being not perceiveable to be agitated by any Winds or Earthquakes: In a word, by no visible thing. It first Tolls, and afterwards, by intervals, Rings out, as well in the Day as the Night: When it is heard, it is not doubted but it denounces some sad Accident; which is what happened in 1601, on Thursday the 13th of June, till Saturday the 15th of the same Month; it ceased then to Ring, but it began again on Corpus Christi, when they were on the point of making the Procession. It was heard likewise when Alphonsus the Fifth, K. of Arragon, went into Italy to take Possession of the Kingdom of Naples. It was heard at the Death of Charles the Fifth. It denoted the Departure of Don Sebastion, King of Portugal, for Africk. The Extremity of King Philip the Second: and the Decease of his last Wife Q. Ann.’ ‘You would have me to believe you, Don Fernand,’ said I; ‘Perhaps I shall seem too obstinate in standing out all this while, but you will agree these are Matters one may lawfully doubt of.’ ‘Nay, Madam,’ replied he, with a pleasant Air, ‘I tell you nothing but what I can have a thousand Witnesses to justifie; but perhaps you will sooner believe Don Esteve de Carvajal in a thing as extraordinary in his Country.’ He at the same time call’d to him, demanding of him, ‘Whether ’twere not true, that there is in the Convent of Cordoüa a Clock which fails not to Ring every time a Religious is to die; so that the time is known to a Day?’ Don Esteve confirm’d what Don Fernand said: and though I remain’d not absolutely convinc’d, yet I made a shew as if I was.
‘You pass so quickly through Old Castille,’ continued Don Fernand, ‘that you will not have time to see what’s most remarkable: The Picture of the Blessed Virgin is talkt of far and near, which was found miraculously stampt on a Rock; it belongs to the Religio’s Augustines d’ Avila, and several Persons go there out of Devotion; but one has no less Curiosity to see certain Mines of Salt, which are near there, in a village call’d Mengraville; you descend above two hundred Steps under Ground, and then enter into a vast Cavern form’d by Nature, whose Top, or Roof, is upheld by one only Pillar of Chrystalin Salt, of astonishing Largeness and Colour. Near this place, in the Town of Soria, you see a great Bridge without a River, and a great River without a Bridge, the River being forc’d out of its place by an Earthquake.
Medina del Campo
‘But if you go as far as Medina del Campo,’ added he, ‘I am sure the Inhabitants will give you a welcome Entrance, only because you are of the French Nation, whom they much affect, to distinguish themselves hereby from the Sentiments of the other Castillians: Their Town is so priviledg’d that the K. of Spain has not the Power to create any Officers, nor the Pope to confer Benefices: this Right belongs to the Townsmen, and they often fall together by the Ears, in the chusing of their Magistrates and Ecclesiasticks.
‘One of the Rarities of this Country is the Aquaduct of Segovia, which is five Leagues in length; it has above two hundred Arches of extraordinary heighth, tho’ in several places there are two standing on one another; and ’tis all built on Free Stone, there having been no Mortar, or any Cement to joyn them: This is lookt on as one of the Romans Works, or at least as worthy to be so. The River which is at the end of the Town surrounds the Castle, and serves it for a Ditch; it is built on a Rock. Among several things remarkable, you see the Effigies of the Kings of Spain, who have Reign’d for several Years: And there is no Town but Segovia and Seville where Money is Coyned, and the Pieces of Eight which are made at the former Places are held to be the best; and this is by means of the River which turns certain Mills that stamp the Money. Here are likewise most curious Walks along a Meadow planted with Elm Trees, whose Leaves are so thick and large, that the greatest Heats of the Sun cannot pierce them.’ ‘I want not Curiosity,’ said I to him, ‘for all things which deserve it; but I at present want Time to see them: However, I should be very glad to arrive timely at Burgos, to view the Town.’ ‘Which is to say, Madam,’ replied Don Fernand, ‘we must lose your Company, and let you retire.’