“I will take no orders from a baba,” he sneered, “I can do as I please. We have freedom now.”
It was a bitter shock to me. Why, this very same soldier would have gone through fire for me a week before. And now he was sneering at me. It seemed incredible and overwhelming.
“Ha, ha,” he jeered. “You can go yourself.”
Flushed with vexation I seized a rifle and answered:
“Can I? I will show you how a free citizen ought to guard his freedom!”
And I climbed over the top and made my way to the listening-post where I remained on duty for the full two hours.
I talked to the soldiers, appealing to their sense of honour and arguing that the revolution imposed greater responsibilities upon the man in the ranks. They agreed that the defence of the country was the most important task confronting us. But had not the revolution brought them also freedom, with the injunction to take upon themselves the control of the army, and to abolish discipline? The men were full of enthusiasm, but obedience was contrary to their ideas of liberty. Seeing that I could not get my men to perform their duties, I went to the Commander of the Company and asked to be released from the army and sent home.
“I see no good in staying here and doing nothing,” I said. “If this is war, I want to be out of it. I can do nothing with my men.”
“Have you gone out of your mind, Yashka?” said the Commander. “Why, if you, who are a peasant yourself, one of them, beloved by all the rank and file, cannot remain, what can we officers do? It is our duty as soldiers to stay to the last, until the men come to their senses. I am having my own troubles, Yashka,” he confided to me, in a low voice. “I cannot have my way, either. So you see, we are all in the same boat. We have just got to put up with it.”
It was altogether contrary to my inclinations, but I remained. Little by little things improved. The soldiers’ committees began to exercise their functions, but they did not interfere with the purely military department of our life. Those of the officers who had been disliked by the men, or whose records were typical of Tsaristic officials, disappeared with the revolution. Even Colonel Stubendorf, the Commander of the Regiment, had gone, retiring perhaps because of his German name. Our new Commander was Kudriavtzev, a popular officer.