At a bachelor dinner the host may provide corsage bouquets for the ladies and boutonnières for the men. It is also a pretty compliment for him to send to the chaperon at his afternoon or evening reception, flowers for her to wear. But this is not essential, and is a compliment that may be dispensed with in the case of a man who must consider the small economies of life.
Of course, no dinner call is made on the bachelor entertainer. It is hardly worth while to suggest that the women whom he has honored make a point of soon inviting him to their homes. In this day there is little need to remind women of the attentions they may with propriety pay to an eligible and unattached man.
CHAPTER XVIII
THE VISITOR
AN invitation to visit a friend in her home must always be answered promptly. The invited person should think seriously before accepting such an invitation, and, unfortunately, one of the things she has to consider is her wardrobe. If the hostess has a superb house, and the guest is to be one of many, all wealthy except herself, all handsomely gowned except herself, and if she will feel like an English sparrow in a flock of birds of paradise, she would better acknowledge the invitation, with gratitude, and stay at home. If she does go, let her determine to make no apologies for her appearance, but to accommodate herself to the ways of the household she visits.
One woman, visiting in a handsome home, was distressed to the point of weeping by the fact that, on her arrival, her hostess’ maid came to the guest’s room and unpacked her trunk for her, putting the contents in bureau-drawers and wardrobe. It would have been better form if the visitor had taken what seemed to her an innovation as a matter of course, and expressed neither chagrin nor distress at the kindly-meant and customary attention.
If, then, our invited person, after taking all things into consideration, decides to accept the invitation sent her, let her state just when she is coming, and go at that time. Of course she will make her plans agree with those of her future hostess. The exact train should be named, and the schedule set must not be deviated from.
It may be said right here that no one should make a visit uninvited. Few persons would do this,—but some few have been guilty of this breach of etiquette. One need not always wait for an invitation from an intimate friend, nor member of one’s family with whom one can never be de trop, but, even then, one should, by telegram or telephone, give notice of one’s coming. If I could, I would make a rule that no one should pay an unexpected visit of several days’ duration. If one must go uninvited, one should give the prospective hosts ample notice of the intended visit, begging, at the same time, that one may be notified if the suggested plan be inconvenient.