BE PROMPT AND DEFINITE
When a letter of invitation is accepted, the acceptance must not only be prompt, but must clearly state how long one intends to stay. It is embarrassing to a hostess not to know whether her guest means to remain a few days or many. As will be seen in the chapter on “The Visited,” the hostess can do much to obviate this uncertainty by asking a friend for a visit of a specified length. But, in accepting, the guest must also say how long she will remain.
An invitation should be received gratefully. In few things does breeding show more than in the manner of acknowledging an invitation to a friend’s house. She who asks another to be a member of her household for even a short time is paying the person asked the greatest honor it is in her power to confer, and it should be appreciated by the recipient. He who does not appreciate the honor implied in such an invitation is unmannerly.
ALWAYS ARRIVE ON TIME
An invitation once accepted, nothing but such a serious contingency as illness must prevent one’s fulfilling the engagement. One must never arrive ahead of time. Once in the home of a friend the guest makes herself as much a member of the household as possible. The hours of meals must be ascertained, and promptness in everything be the rule. To lie in bed after one is called, and to appear at the breakfast table at one’s own sweet will, is often an inconvenience to the hostess, and the cause of vexation and discontent on the part of the servants, for which discontent the hostess—not the guest—pays the penalty. Unless, then, the latter is told expressly that the hour at which she descends to the first meal of the day is truly of no consequence in the household, she must come into the breakfast-room at the hour named by the mistress of the house.
THE DUTIES OF A GUEST
On the other hand, one should not come down a half-hour before breakfast and sit in the drawing-room or library, thus keeping the maid or hostess from dusting these rooms and setting them to rights. The considerate guest will stay in her own room until breakfast is announced, then descend immediately. If the weather is fair, she may, of course, walk in the grounds close to the house.