MCIX.—TRUTH AND FICTION.
A traveller relating his adventures, told the company that he and his servants had made fifty wild Arabs run; which startling them, he observed, that there was no great matter in it,—"For," says he, "we ran, and they ran after us."
MCX.—A REASONABLE REFUSAL.
At the time of expected invasion at the beginning of the century, some of the town magistrates called upon an old maiden lady of Montrose, and solicited her subscription to raise men for the service of the King. "Indeed," she answered right sturdily, "I'll do nae sic thing; I never could raise a man for mysel, and I'm no gaun to raise men for King George."
MCXI.—LORD NORTH'S DROLLERY.
A vehement political declaimer, calling aloud for the head of Lord North, turned round and perceived his victim unconsciously indulging in a quiet slumber, and, becoming still more exasperated, denounced the Minister as capable of sleeping while he ruined his country; the latter only complained how cruel it was to be denied a solace which other criminals so often enjoyed, that of having a night's rest before their fate. On Mr. Martin's proposal to have a starling placed near the chair, and taught to repeat the cry of "Infamous coalition!" Lord North coolly suggested, that, as long as the worthy member was preserved to them, it would be a needless waste of the public money, since the starling might well perform his office by deputy.
MCXII.—INCAPACITY.
A young ecclesiastic asked his bishop permission to preach. "I would permit you," answered the prelate; "but nature will not."
MCXIII.—EPIGRAM.
(Suggested by hearing a debate in the House of Commons.)