"All that is necessary for the enjoyment of sausages at breakfast is confidence."
MCCCVIII.—A JEW'S EYE TO BUSINESS.
A Jew, who was condemned to be hanged, was brought to the gallows, and was just on the point of being turned off, when a reprieve arrived. When informed of this, it was expected he would instantly have quitted the cart, but he stayed to see a fellow-prisoner hanged; and being asked why he did not get about his business, he said, "he waited to see if he could bargain with Mr. Ketch for the other gentleman's clothes."
MCCCIX.—ST. PETER A BACHELOR.
In the list of benefactors to Peter-House is Lady Mary Ramsay, who is reported to have offered a very large property, nearly equal to a new foundation to this college, on condition that the name should be changed to Peter and Mary's; but she was thwarted in her intention by Dr. Soame, then master. "Peter," said the crabbed humorist, "has been too long a bachelor to think of a female companion in his old days."
MCCCX.—TRUE OF BOTH.
"I swear," said a gentleman to his mistress, "you are very handsome."—"Pooh!" said the lady, "so you would say if you did not think so."—"And so you would think," answered he, "though I should not say so."
MCCCXI.—A POSER.
A lecturer, wishing to explain to a little girl the manner in which a lobster casts his shell when he has outgrown it, said, "What do you do when you have outgrown your clothes? You throw them aside, don't you?"—"O no!" replied the little one, "we let out the tucks!" The doctor confessed she had the advantage of him there.