What is the best land for little kittens?—Lapland.
Why should a man always wear a watch when he travels in a waterless desert?—Because every watch has a spring in it.
Of what trade is the sun?—A tanner.
What relation is a doormat to a door?—Step-fa(r)ther.
What is that which you cannot hold ten minutes, although it is as light as a feather?—Your breath.
What is the worst weather for rats and mice?—When it rains cats and dogs.
What is that which never uses its teeth for eating purposes?—A comb.
When are two apples alike?—When pared.
What is the difference between a blind man and a sailor in prison?—One cannot see to go and the other cannot go to sea.
Why is a plum-cake like the ocean?—Because it contains so many currants.