It is, nevertheless, possible that my discreet mother might have had a third gallant in some commoner, for she that deceives one man is very capable of deceiving two; but whether it was instinct, or that I confided in my mother’s assurance, I always looked upon the noble Genoese as my father, and I can assure you, that whether he actually was my father or not, he loved both my mother and me most tenderly; which he made sufficiently appear afterwards, as regarded her, by the bold step he ventured to take in marrying her. He knew very well what reputation she had, and that he should be pointed at in the city, where my mother was well known by the name of the knight’s lady. But what did he care for that? he knew very well what he did; for at the commencement of their acquaintance his affairs were on the decline, and the continuation of it did not, by any means, tend to ameliorate them; while the lady, who had at least as much knavery about her as good management, had dispensed her favours to so good an account, that she was now mistress of at least ten thousand ducats, which sum was the means of saving my father from another stoppage he was on the point of making, and enabled him to make as good a figure as ever among the merchants. He was, unfortunately, passionately fond of company, splendour, and show; but as he could not long satisfy this ruling passion, without plunging himself into the same difficulties again, from which my mother’s money had but just extricated him, he found himself, a few years after his marriage, obliged to become bankrupt again for the last time; I say the last time, because, finding himself without resource, and utterly unable to keep up his former equipage and appearance, he chose rather to die with chagrin, than to survive the date of his prosperity.
Life had more charms for my mother, who bore my father’s loss with considerable fortitude, though she was much afflicted at his death. Our houses were obliged to be given up to his creditors. We had now only a few jewels left, besides the furniture, which my mother turned into money, and retired to a small house where she determined to live in a private manner, as well as she could. She did not take this step on account of her inability to maintain us by fresh intrigues; for, although she was already in her fortieth year, she had always taken such good care of herself, that even at this time of life, she was not a conquest to be despised; but as she could not make up her mind to make the first advances to men who had formerly sought her favours with ardour, this noble feeling of pride so ill accorded with the situation of our domestic affairs, that they daily grew worse and worse.
I doubt not that my mother has a thousand times wished she had had a girl instead of me, which would, undoubtedly, have been much more to her advantage, and who might have been a support to her, as she herself was to my grandmother, of whom I feel it incumbent on me to afford you a more detailed account. She was one of the finest women of her time in the kingdom, was extremely witty and well-bred. None but young noblemen were admitted into her house, such as wished to improve themselves in politeness and gallantry, and they certainly might be said to be fine gentlemen, after having gone through her course of lessons for a few years. But what is most to be wondered at, is the perfect harmony that reigned among her scholars. While she had given her mind up to perfect these young folks, she lay in with my mother somehow or other; and, as she herself scarcely knew how this happened, she gave every one of these gentlemen the honour of it separately, satisfying each of them that her daughter resembled him in some particular. “Do but look at her mouth,” would she say to one; “observe but her eyes,” would she say to another; “you cannot pretend to disown this child;” and the more to induce them to believe her, she took great pains always to call her by the name of the cavalier who was present; and if there happened to be more than one, which was not uncommonly the case, she was called Donna Marcella, which was her christian name; as for the Donna, it would be unjust, indeed, to dispute her right to that title, since she, without doubt, was the daughter of a person of quality. But to let you a little more into the secret of her birth, you must know, that among my grandmother’s gallants there was one whom she loved best of any; and as this gentleman was a Guzman, she considered that she might conscientiously make her daughter descend from so illustrious a house. At least this is what she afterwards told my mother in confidence, though she confessed at the same time, that for ought she knew, she might have been begot by a certain lord, who was a near relation to the dukes of Medina Sidonia.
From what I have now told you respecting my grandmother, you will perceive that she was scarcely to be matched in love intrigues; nevertheless, as she was a very extravagant woman, and never so much as thought of laying by the profit of her favours, she must inevitably have been reduced to indigence in her old age, had not her daughter’s beauty began to shine forth in proportion as her own faded and declined. The good old lady was very impatient until the little Marcella was sufficiently grown and well-shaped to think of settling her; and finding that at twelve years old she was very forward for her age, she no longer delayed endeavouring to provide for her. A merchant newly arrived from Peru, and richer than a jew, enjoyed her first favours, through the assistance of four thousand ducats, which he presented to my grandmother; and finding a successor as generous as the merchant, for every day in the week, she lived in plenty, by that means, for the remaining part of her life.
A daughter in my stead, would, certainly, then, have been better for my mother, or even had she had us both, my sister would have been a harbour for us in our present wreck, and we should soon have made a good fortune at Seville, where purchasers are always sure to be found for every sort of commodity. It is the common retreat of persons who have only their wits to live on: it serves as the mother to orphans, and a cloak to sinners. At all events, if that city were not sufficient, we could have proceeded to Madrid, where such a jewel is always saleable. If, at first, we were not able to dispose of it for a permanency, there we could, at least, put it in pledge to so good an account, as always to live in plenty. If I am not more awkward than another man, I think that having a pretty sister, I could have managed to obtain some good preferment; but Heaven ordained it otherwise, and made me an only son for my sins.
I had just entered my fourteenth year, and as I could not look without pain on the misery with which we were threatened, I resolved to leave my mother and my country, and to seek my fortune elsewhere. My wish to travel was for the purpose of seeing and knowing a little of the world, and I always had a particular desire to visit my father’s relations at Genoa. So that not being able any longer to defer the execution of my design, I left Seville on a beautiful day, with my purse almost as destitute of money as my head was crammed with idle fancies and chimeras.
CHAP. V.
Guzman sets out from Seville. His first adventure at an Inn.
As I remembered to have heard said that it was usual with such as have to to seek their fortunes to give themselves names of consequence, without which they would pass for nobody in strange countries, I took my mother’s name, which was Guzman, and to add to it d’Alfarache. This appeared to me so well imagined, that I felt fully persuaded in my own imagination that I was already nothing less than the illustrious Don Guzman d’Alfarache.
This newly created signor not having set out until late in the afternoon, went but a short distance the first day, though he made what haste he could for fear of being pursued. In fact I went no farther than the chapel of St. Lazarus, which is but a short way from the city. Being already fatigued I sat down on the steps rather sorrowfully, beginning to feel some anxiety as to what would become of me. After having sat there thinking for some time, a religious idea came across my mind, which I immediately gratified by entering the chapel, where I addressed myself to God, beseeching him to inspire me with his counsels. My prayer was fervent, but short, the time not allowing me to make it longer, for it was just the hour for closing the chapel, which I was therefore obliged to quit, and I was left on the steps again, where I remained not without fear of what might happen to me.