Time appeared less tedious to him at table than to me in the tub, and I could not possibly conceive how so passionate a fellow could remain so long patient even in eating. He amused himself in this manner, however, for about an hour; and that hour appeared an age to me. He drank at least as heartily as he ate, and emptied three of my bottles in the course of his meal; and when the table was cleared, he called for pipes and tobacco, to make an end, as he said, of the fourth. Upon this the lady, wishing to make me believe that she desired to get rid of this intruder, entreated him to go and smoke in his own chamber, and to leave her at liberty to undress herself and go to bed; but he answered rudely, that she might retire whither she pleased, but that for his own part he felt very comfortable where he was, and intended to pass the night there.
Hearing this last resolution, I now completely gave myself up for lost; for I had flattered myself that the least this abominable intruder could do, after having stuffed himself in this style, was to leave the chamber as he was requested; and that I should remain alone with his sister, to pick the bones he was kind enough to leave. I even hoped that the latter part of the night might prove more agreeable to me than the commencement, but I did not long remain under this flattering delusion. The lady, as though she partook of my uneasiness, endeavoured to prevail on her brother to change his mind, but not being able to succeed either by tears or entreaties, she left the room with all the appearance of being much distressed on my account. No sooner had she gone, than her brother began to behave himself as if he were drunk or mad; sometimes he would sit very quietly for a few minutes, then jump up and walk and dance about the room with his pipe in his mouth; sometimes he would snatch up his sword, and fence against the hangings; whistling, singing, and talking to himself all this while, and swearing like a Jew, threatening to exterminate any man who should dare even so much as look at him.
After having passed above half the night in these extravagances, he at last threw himself at full length on the bed without undressing, placing his sword and pistols within his reach, by way of precaution. “God be praised,” said I to myself, “it will not be necessary, now that he is on the bed, to rock him to sleep; he will soon begin snoring to his heart’s content.” I was, however, once more out in my reckoning; his wine had not the same effect upon him that it has upon others, for, instead of falling asleep, he did nothing but doze at intervals for the space of about two hours, starting up every moment, and crying out, who’s there? as if he heard some noise in the chamber. The only noise that I made, however, in my tub, was in lifting up a corner of the tapestry, to hear whether he slept or not, which, in my impatience to quit this cursed house, I certainly did pretty frequently. Heaven at last took pity on me. This boisterous hero, at about day-break, fell a snoring most lustily; and I then slipped from under my tub as quietly as possible, determined to run all risks rather than remain any longer, and reached the chamber door on tiptoe, with my shoes in my hand. I raised the latch very gently, and made haste towards the street-door, and being so fortunate as to find the key hanging up by it, I opened the door, and ran all the way home to our inn.
Here I found that nobody was yet stirring, not even my page, who thinking that I should of course pass the night in the arms of love, had gone to bed very coolly, without giving himself any concern about me. As I was not willing to disturb any body, I walked into a pastry-cook’s shop in the neighbourhood, that was just opening, and telling the master that I was dying with hunger, requested he would provide me with something to eat. He answered that he had now in his oven some little pasties, fit to be presented to the Archbishop of Toledo, which would soon be sufficiently baked. I determined not to lose this treat, and while I waited until the pasties were drawn from the oven, I had an opportunity of reflecting on my late cruel adventure, and the more I considered it, the more lucky did I esteem myself in having got off so cheaply.
The pastry cook had not, in my opinion, boasted of his pasties without reason, for I either found them excellent, or else my appetite gave them an exquisite taste, which they probably had not. When I left this shop it was quite day; I entered our inn and hastened to my chamber, where I lay down on my bed, and at last fell into a sound sleep, after having tumbled about for two hours without being able to get my late adventure with the brother and sister, and the characters which they had so well supported, out of my head.
CHAP. XVI.
Guzman’s amours continued, and in what manner they ended.
I could well have slept until very late in the morning; but as two ladies had inquired for me below, one of whom was so richly dressed that my lackey was quite dazzled by her magnificent appearance, he came up to my chamber and awoke me to announce this visit. I presently guessed this must be the waiting-woman whom I had conversed with the day before, who had kept her promise, by prevailing on her mistress to accompany her to call upon me. I had no sooner desired my lackey to shew them in, than a lady of handsome mien and figure entered the room, who by her elegant deportment and easy manners, could not in my judgment be less than a Marchioness or Countess. She seated herself in a chair at my bed side. I sat up in my bed and bowed to her as respectfully as my situation would admit of, begging her to excuse me for receiving her in this manner, and adding that I had much rather offend in that respect, than allow a lady of her quality and merit to wait a moment at the door. “No more apologies,” said she, “but let us come to the point and content my curiosity: How long have you been in Toledo? what has brought you hither? shall you make a long stay in this place?”
These questions, unexpected as they were, were by no means embarrassing to me, for I had a most fruitful invention on such occasions; I, therefore, made up so fine a story of my birth and prospects in life, that I completely succeeded in convincing her of my high quality. One truth, however, escaped me in the course of conversation, which spoiled all the effect of my lies; instead of saying that I intended to stay at least three or four months at Toledo, I told her that I had merely visited it for a few days’ diversion. I instantly perceived that this was not exactly agreeable to her hopes. She had evidently formed some design upon me, which these words disconcerted; and looking upon me, in consequence, as a mere bird of passage, whom she should soon lose sight of for ever, she resolved to pluck me as well as she was able before we parted.
To accomplish her object, therefore, the first thing she did was to throw off her veil, in an easy and graceful manner, discovering a face of perfect beauty, and taking great pains to display her delicate white hands and a part of her neck. She then, with a negligent air, drew from her pocket a fine coral rosary, to which were attached several relics, gold crosses and precious stones, and without appearing to have any design in it, kept playing with this rosary all the while she was talking as though she were not aware of what she was doing, but all of a sudden she left off speaking in the middle of a sentence, looked at me with surprise, and began feeling her pockets with anxiety which seemed to increase every moment. I inquired the cause of her uneasiness, but instead of answering me she began to look on the floor, and every where that she could think of; then calling her servant who was in waiting at the chamber door: “Marcia,” said she, “I have lost the great cross belonging to the chaplet which my husband gave me; how unfortunate I am! he will certainly think I have made a present of it to some one.” “Madam,” replied the waiting-woman, “you are perhaps premature in your sorrow. You may possibly have left it at home, and I even fancy that I recollect to have seen it in one of your drawers.” “I can never rest until I be convinced of this,” replied the lady. “Let us therefore return home immediately, for I cannot bear to remain in doubt on such a subject.”