I amused myself a great part of the afternoon in reading this budget of extravagances, expecting every moment to hear again from Don Lucio, and was just growing weary of staying so long within doors, when Don Antonio and some friends of his called upon me. They began, by telling me that they were come to offer me their services in the affair of honour that I had on hand, adding that the whole town knew that Don Lucio had sent me a challenge, and that duelling being prohibited, that Cavalier was already arrested. From this circumstance it was pretty clear to me that Don Antonio and his friends were of that description of persons, who are ever most eager to proffer their assistance, when they know that all danger is over. I accordingly related as much to my own advantage as possible, the full particulars of what had passed that morning between me and Don Lucio’s messenger; upon which Don Antonio represented to me that I might also be arrested, and invited me to retire to his house. This I did not fail to accede to, for I dreaded any thing like imprisonment for more reasons than one. I passed the remainder of the day at that gentleman’s house, but not intending to sleep there, I left him about ten o’clock at night to return to my inn.
On my way home I met two ladies, attended by a footman who carried a large lantern, by the light of which, I soon distinguished that they were extremely handsome. I therefore accosted them in the most polite manner, and they answered my civilities with considerable vivacity; and, judging from my appearance and dress that I should be an easy prey, they ogled me in such a manner that I could not resist accompanying them farther than I intended; but having come to the corner of a street, they stopped all of a sudden, and one of them said: “Come no farther, I beg. Sir; we are only going to visit a sick lady who resides a few doors up this street. If you have time to wait, we shall be walking home again in about a quarter of an hour, and you may not repent of having met us. You shall hear a song, and the lute played to admiration.” Thus saying, they escaped from me, leaving me so fully persuaded they would keep their promise, that I was fool enough to wait in the street until near midnight. By that time, however, I was but too well convinced that I had been duped, sharp and cunning as I thought myself; and must further confess, to my confusion, that I had not even saved my purse from the dexterity of these accomplished damsels.
Being obliged, on my way to my lodging, to pass the house of my fair widow, I could not refuse myself the pleasure of gazing on it for some time, and I fancied that I perceived a man at the door. I imagined at first that this must be Don Lucio, knowing that he was in the habit of stationing himself near that spot every night, and this thought was accompanied by an emotion mingled with fear and jealousy. Recollecting, however, that he was in prison, I reflected that it could not be him; I grew confident, and, incited by jealousy, advanced towards the object that created it, and who, apparently, more afraid than myself, disappeared at my approach. Having reached the door, I heard the deafened creakings of a bolt, whence I concluded that some one was opening it as quietly as possible. I was not mistaken in my conjecture, for in a moment after, the door was half opened, so as to admit a man. Curiosity to know the bottom of this affair, in which I believed myself to be more interested than I really was, prompted me to slip in as quietly as possible. I immediately felt a hand held out to conduct me, for there was not a glimpse of light in the passage. I thought from the first, that the person mistook me, and could no longer doubt it, when being led into a back parlour, I was rather roughly regaled with a most fervent embrace, seasoned with the fragrant and delightful smell of pepper, garlic and saffron, which convinced me that this transported lover, who was so profuse of her favours, could be no other than the cook. In the midst of her transports, however, she began to suspect, from touching my clothes and face, that I could not be the favoured swain whom she expected; and at length being convinced of her mistake, she suddenly let go her hold of me, and thought to escape; but I held her fast by the petticoat. She exerted all her strength to disengage herself, and I was as determined to detain her, until at length we both fell down with a tremendous crash. This noise awoke two footmen, who lay in an adjoining closet. They jumped instantly out of bed, thinking they heard thieves, and each arming himself with a sword, crept softly with a lamp into the parlour, where they found us stretched at our length on the floor.
They recognised me immediately, and surprised to see a gentleman who aspired to the hand of their mistress contending with so much violence for the good graces of a kitchen wench, who had never even tempted themselves, they burst into an immoderate fit of laughter, to my utter confusion. The insolence of the creature herself was surprising: she accused me of a deliberate design to violate her honour, and asserted that I had secreted myself in the house with that view. Without waiting to justify myself, I picked up my hat, which had been knocked off my head by a violent box on the ears, and addressing myself to the servant who carried the lamp, desired him to light me to the street door, which he did, grinning all the way in such a manner, that I was almost tempted to knock him down. I soon reached my inn, cruelly mortified at so disgraceful and pitiful an adventure, not doubting that the story would be all over the town the next day, and that I should be the common talk of all the inhabitants. This idea, which afflicted me more than you can possibly imagine, made me resolve to stay no longer in Saragossa than was absolutely necessary to make preparations for my departure. My equipage was ready, therefore, at break of day, and my mules as though they partook of their master’s impatience to leave a place where he could not again make his appearance without shame, commenced their journey with a speed and seeming anxiety which pleased me exceedingly.
CHAP. XLVII.
Guzman departs for Madrid, where he engages in a new gallantry, the CONCLUSION of which does not prove so agreeable as the COMMENCEMENT.
I took the road to Madrid, and six days after my departure from Saragossa, I arrived at Alcala de Henares, a town, the situation of which is delightful, and which the beauty of its buildings renders comparable with the most flourishing capitols in the world. In addition to this, the belles lettres were cultivated there to perfection. I should certainly have taken up my abode there, had I not been foolishly desirous to visit St. James’s once more, where I had formerly acted so miserable a part.
I stopped but eight days at Alcala, and then proceeded towards Madrid. That celebrated city saw arrive, with three mules in his train, two of which were laden with valuable property, that same Guzman who had formerly carried a basket in its market-place. I hesitated for some time as to where I should take up my lodging; but recollecting that in my time the best inn was in Toledo-street, I determined to alight there. I found it strangely changed. The landlord was dead, and his widow, though a shrewd active woman, who had more than one string to her bow, could not support its reputation on the same footing. It was certainly much fallen off; but the extreme civility with which they treated me, whom they looked upon as a rich young nobleman, prevented me from leaving them.
My next care was, to make special inquiries about my old friend the three-bagged apothecary; and though I did not much fear that I could be recognised, I must confess that I felt a secret joy when I learnt that he had taken his departure for that country whither his drugs had despatched so many of his patients before him. Ten years, however, had now elapsed since I left Madrid, and, besides that, I was much altered in person; who the devil could have recognized poor Guzman in the finery with which he was now disguised? I took great pleasure in shewing myself off in my best suits, particularly in the one I had purchased at Saragossa. I exhibited myself in them by turns, in the morning at the different churches, and in the evening at the prado.