A clever woman, to whom all social arts were long-solved problems, once said that she always observed how the chairs were left in a drawing room where several people had been sitting and put them in the same position next time. A group near the door where the casual caller will naturally drop into one and the hostess into another without the least effort, will be placed in the best possible position for a little chat. Fulfill these conditions and your drawing room will be often filled and the fame of it will go abroad.
Formal calls, as a rule, are at best but a duty performed that brings a satisfaction in itself, but it sometimes happens that, as a reward for our well-doing, some word may be said, some friend may be met by a happy chance that is like a gleam of sunshine on a cloudy day.
[Invitations Formal and Informal]
There are certain rules to be observed in the writing of invitations that cannot be transgressed without incurring a just suspicion as to the degree of one’s acquaintance with the laws and canons that govern our best society. For instance, Mrs. John Doe issues invitations for a ball or evening party; these, if issued in her own name or in the name of herself and daughter, or lady friend, would, very properly, find them “at home” on a certain evening. Should, however, the invitations be sent out in the name of herself and husband, then it is that “Mr. and Mrs. John Doe request the pleasure of Mr. and Mrs. Richard Roe’s company” at a certain date. We will also find that Mr. Dick Roe is never “at home,” but “requests the pleasure of your company.”
To widely depart from any of these received canons of etiquette is to commit a decided solecism and to discover an utter unfitness for the desired social rank. Fortunately, there is no need, even for those not to the manor born, of displaying any ignorance in this matter when the simple consultation of a standard work on social etiquette will give the needed information and save the credit of the individual.