Each to His Need

Waitress (calling into the kitchen at a country tavern):—“For the gentleman vegetarian a little green fodder, and for his steel horse a drop of oil!”

What Papa Brought Home from His Trip

Papa (bringing his wheel in):—“Come here, wifey, and bring all the children! Now, all of you open your mouths wide, I am going to open the pneumatic tubes, that I filled on the Arlberg with delicious mountain air for you!”

A New Word

A:—“Who is that gentleman in that sporty costume?”

B:—“That is a teacher of cycling.”

A:—“Oh, a sort of velocipedagogue.”

CHAPTER IX
Authors, Scientists, Artists, and other Celebrities