Lieutenant:—“Pardon me, Major, if I doubt it in spite of that.”

Major (boiling with rage):—“Very well, Lieutenant, then I tell you officially, that it was on the thirteenth.”

Lieutenant:—“Very well, Major, then it was on the thirteenth.”

Modest

The Lieutenant wishes to give to a reporting soldier a cigar, and opens a fresh box.

Soldier:—“Oh don’t trouble about opening the box, sir; I can do that at home.”

Poison in It

Captain:—“John, go up-stairs and ask my wife to give you my field-flask; but don’t you drink out of it. I believe there is poison in it.”

John (in the Captain’s rooms):—“Will the gracious Frau kindly give me the Captain’s field-flask?”