“Can you not swim?” he asked the man.
“No, sir,” answered the boatman.
“Then you are the one to row me over.”
Gave What They Wished
During war time a parson wished to rouse his congregation to more enthusiastic patriotism, so, when addressing them one day, he cried: “Ha! Already I see the enemy coming, see him enter your village, burn your homes, take away your wives and daughters! Yes, they are coming, they are near; do you see the flags waving? Do you hear the beating of the drums?” at the same time drumming on the pulpit with both fists. Immediately the schoolmaster behind the pulpit imitated the blowing of a bugle. The parson turning around, whispered: “Schoolmaster, what are you doing?”
“I am helping you, sir,” he replied. “I know our farmers. Infantry alone won’t do; you want cavalry too.”
Located at Last
In one of Munich’s streets, a crowd had gathered around a little lost boy. He answered all questions as to his name, where he lived, with: “I don’t know.” There seemed nothing left to do, but to take him to the police station, when some knowing fellow had a bright thought. He planted himself in front of the boy saying, “Now you just tell me, sonny, where do you buy your beer?”
“At the Franziskaner,” was the quick reply. There he was taken and was soon identified.