“Well, you see, the medicine tastes so horrid, that it is great fun to see the faces he makes, as I pour it down his throat.”
Better Than Half a Nose
While operating upon an old man, Professor Billroth, of Vienna, told the physicians and students present the following amusing story: “Some time ago an old man came to me to consult me about the disease of his nose. He owned only half a one, and that was not worth much, so he thought I could operate upon it and give him a decent artificial one. I asked how old he was. ‘I am eighty years old,’ he said.
“‘Do you think it necessary at that age to undergo an operation?’ I asked of my patient.
“‘Professor,’ says the old fellow, ‘my father lived to be one hundred and twenty-five years old, and I don’t see why I should walk around for forty-five years with only half a nose.’”
Kill or Cure
The wife of a farmer in Westphalia was seriously ill, and the doctor was sent for.
“I have a hundred thalers in this bag here, doctor,” said the well-to-do farmer, “and whether you kill her or cure her, you shall have the money.” The patient died. A few months later, the doctor came to get the promised money.
“I am ready to keep my promise,” said the farmer, “but first you will answer me two questions: did you kill my wife?”
“God forbid!” said the doctor. “I certainly could not say yes, to that!”