Basutoland: Its Legends and Customs

by Minnie Martin

The bridegroom's companions now begin to dance, and all the girls of the village must join in the dancing, with the exception of the bride and three chosen companions. This is continued till dark, all the bridegroom's procession sleeping in the bride's village for the night. The next morning the bride's father chooses the fattest ox he possesses and has it killed, thus showing the bargain is completed. Should there be no ox killed, then the bridegroom's father knows there is some hitch, either the dowry is not sufficient, or a more eligible suitor has come forward. A little tact and patience is necessary to find this out, as no direct questions may be asked. If it is merely a matter of dowry, a bargain is made, and, upon the arrival of the extra cattle, the proceedings continue. After the ox is killed, the dewlap is cut off and divided into two strips, one of which is bound round the girl's wrist, and the other sent to the bridegroom to be bound round his wrist. This signifies that they are now bound to each other. The bridegroom's father then sends for a big ox, which is killed, and the skin given to the bride's mother. All that day there is feasting and merry-making. The next day the bridegroom's procession returns home. For a period of from one to three months from this time the bridegroom continues to herd his father's cattle, and life goes on much as usual, except that the father and mother set about preparing their son's future home. When the necessary time has expired, the bride sets out for her husband's home, accompanied by two girl companions and two old women. On leaving her father's house she must not say good-bye to her parents, nor must she speak or look back until she reaches her husband. To look back or bid farewell would show regret, and be an insult to her lord. Silence is enjoined, because her first word must be her greeting to him. As a rule several of her girl friends accompany her part of the way, laughing and singing, and doing all in their power to make her either speak or look back. While they are yet some little distance from the bridegroom's village, they come to a standstill, the old women obstinately refusing to go any farther until some suitable gift is presented to them. The watchers at the village, who have seen all this byplay, and quite understand what it means, hasten to tell the bridegroom's father, who at once sends out either some wearing apparel, an ox, or young animal. As soon as the sun sets, the bride enters the village, being conducted straight to the bridegroom's house. She and her four companions must remain perfectly silent, nor must they accept any refreshment from the bridegroom's mother until his father has killed and roasted a sheep and offered a portion of it to them to eat. The girl must be kept at her mother-in-law's hut for the night, and remain perfectly silent. A number of wedding guests now assemble, and feasting and singing continue all night. In the morning the bride's friends return to their homes.

For the next month the bride is instructed in all household work by her mother-in-law, and carries all the water from the well for the use of the household. While going to fetch water she must neither turn her head nor speak, no matter who may accost her. While in the "skerm," or even in the hut, she is allowed to converse in low tones with any one who comes in, but her voice must not be raised either in anger or laughter. All this time remarks are freely made in her hearing as to her attractions or lack of such, and very outspoken are those remarks.

Meanwhile, the bridegroom endeavours by every means in his power to see and speak to his bride, but on no account must others see him near the hut, and his mother keeps watch more or less strictly, as she happens to be more or less favourably disposed towards his bride. The consequence is that the bridegroom creeps round the hut whenever he gets away from observation, and, should he be fortunate enough to find his bride alone in the "skerm," he crawls in and talks to her in low tones while she is grinding, for, upon seeing him enter in that manner, she knows he is her husband, and instantly begins grinding. Should any one be heard approaching the hut, the bridegroom will at once disappear. When the month of probation is ended, the bride is conducted to her own hut, and freed from all restrictions.

It is the custom of the wife, some few months afterwards, to take her pitcher to the well, break it, and leave the broken pieces where they will be seen, and run away to her own parents, without giving any one a hint as to her intentions. Her mother will at once make her a new pitcher. When it is ready she and her friends will set out for her own home, laden with pots of "leting," and in some cases driving an ox before them. Her return is the signal for renewed feasting and merrymaking.

Of course, now that the missionaries have introduced European marriage customs, a great many of these native rites and ceremonies are done away with, a Christian native's marriage being conducted on the same lines and subject to the same rules as a white man's, the bride even adorning herself with cheap (in quality, but not in price) white finery, with the orthodox wreath and veil, in which, poor creature, did she but know it, she looks extremely ridiculous. She is attended by bridesmaids, all decked out in bright colours, and the bridegroom and best man are resplendent in brand-new suits, white dress shirts, and upright collars, with gorgeous ties.

A Mosuto has no objection to marriage with a blood relation, provided she will prove a desirable connection, and it is the custom for the chiefs to inherit their fathers' wives as well as his other possessions. These wives, as a rule, each chief distributes amongst his councillors and favourites, but their children are always called his, thus giving him a considerable source of wealth, as the sons work for him, and the daughters bring him large dowries of cattle. Fidelity, either from the husband or wife, is a virtue rarely to be found amongst the heathen, but its absence creates no trouble as long as it is not discovered. If a man ill-uses his wife to any great extent, she can return to her father; the marriage is then annulled, and her father is entitled to retain both her and the cattle paid by the ex-husband for her at the time of the marriage.

In cases where a chief wishes to retain the services of a man, he will bestow one of his wives upon him for the length of time his services are required, but any children born of this marriage belong to the chief. This state of affairs is kept as much as possible from the knowledge of Europeans, and indeed the missionaries have done much towards the improvement of the people in this respect, as well as in other ways; but, while such vast numbers are averse to Christianity, the improvement must naturally be slow.

Such a thing as an "old maid" is almost unknown amongst the heathen Basuto, nor are widows allowed to remain as such for any length of time. Generally, a widow is married again twelve months after her husband's death, to his nearest blood relation, most frequently his brother.

The superstitions and practices with regard to illness and death are worthy of record. If any one is taken ill it is believed to be because he or she has offended the spirits of his forefathers. To propitiate them, an ox or a sheep must at once be sacrificed, the blood of which must be used to wash the sick person, while the fat from the entrails of the sacrifice must be wrapped round the patient's neck. The meat of the sacrifice is eaten by the "family doctor" and the male relations, without salt, and at one meal. If the patient recovers, it is because the sacrifice has found favour with the spirits; but if he dies, they are still angry, and further means must be taken to propitiate them.

In cases of serious illness, when it is unmistakable that death is near, the sick person is taken out of the hut, if it is at all possible to remove him, without causing him instant death, as the spirits obtain easier access to the "Skerm" than to the interior of the hut. A hole is cut in the "Skerm" to enable the spirits to enter, as they cannot do so through the doorway of mortals. The friends and relatives of the dying man (or woman) then bid him farewell and leave him to the care of the watchers, old women, blood relations of the family. These heartless creatures resort to the most cruel and barbarous acts, which it would be too revolting to describe; suffice it to say, that, ere life is quite extinct, they place their victims in the recognisedly correct posture, namely, in an upright position, with knees up to chin, and arms doubled up. They then tie him securely so that he cannot move his limbs.