The right hand should be at the lady’s back, between the lower ends of the shoulder-blades, and should always carry a silk handkerchief. Never in dancing hold a lady close to you, for it is the most disagreeable position for her, and looks decidedly improper. Hold your partner at all times at arms’ length; this gives you freedom of speech, space to use the feet, and allows you to glide more easily. In a waltz, always take a long, sweeping glide, with as little rise as possible. Any step between a Boston dip and the Philadelphia glide, if used as a sort of an imperceptible, sweeping dip, will appear to great advantage on the floor. A Polka should either be glided or walked through; never skip, and do not take too long a step, and do away entirely with all fancy variations of the dance. Keep strictly to the original Polka form and you will avoid all awkward appearances. The same rule applies to the Yorke, Galop, etc. The Schottische is a beautiful dance, if performed gracefully as in the waltz, only much more care should be exercised in the forward steps. Do not use that once popular, but awkward manner of skipping in this dance, but the more modern three running steps. Those familiar with all these popular dances will comprehend the importance of my criticisms. The Caprice is the combination dance of waltz and polka, and necessitates more care and attention than any other. Nothing but the glide step should be used in this dance.
16. Balls, Dancing Classes, Theater Parties, Receptions.—These may all be given by gentlemen, if they have married ladies as patronesses. Theater parties can be followed by dinners at the popular restaurants, the chaperon attending. If the party occupies more than one box, an equal number of chaperons should accompany it.
17. Bowling—Card-playing.—In bowling, a gentleman should keep the score, notify the ladies of their turns as they come round, hand them the balls—not too large, but heavy enough to be thrown with ease and effect. See that they enjoy the game thoroughly, or else cease the sport. If you notice fatigue in a lady’s manner, ask her to desist. Many sprains, dislocations, and twists are the result of attempting to throw balls with tired wrists. A gentleman can organize a bowling club under the supervision of a chaperon attending each meeting.
At cards, he pays strict attention to those playing; he endeavors to make the games pleasant. He should never look over another’s hand of cards; and, above all, should never cheat. He should never gamble and bet on cards, nor allow games of that kind in his house.
18. Musicales—Matinée Parties.—Gentlemen attend these either as escorts or alone. They are at liberty to give them whenever they desire to do so. They must always have a patroness or chaperon present.
19. (1) When asked to participate in amateur theatricals, do not unhesitatingly accept the invitation, but first consider your ability, not only to act the part tendered you, but that which is of more importance, viz., to be able to act gracefully, and carry it out in all its perfection; for it is only of too frequent occurrence that young men readily accept, confident of being able to memorize their part, disregarding the fact that memorizing is not acting. After having accepted an invitation to act, being of fair ability so to do, be careful to pay strict attention to your part, and be punctual at all the rehearsals. Gentlemen can organize amateur theatrical clubs among themselves at discretion, but on no occasion should ladies be included without a chaperon at hand.
(2) Never offer to recite, and if asked to do so, decline, unless you are sure of what you are about to recite. Do not make your recitations too lengthy, and not too dramatic. Be sure that your gestures are fitted for the words used; make them few, but telling. Do not hurry through a piece; and above all, do not shout; suit the voice to the size of the room or hall in which you are reciting. If encored, acknowledge such by another piece, or repetition of the first; but to further applause, merely bow.
20. Breakfasts can be given at any time within the hours of eight and twelve A. M., to gentlemen, or ladies and gentlemen, a chaperon being present for the latter. Invitations for these, as for any other event, should be answered within the customary time—two weeks before the occurrence; or, if the invitation is later than two weeks before date of breakfast, an immediate reply is necessary.
21. When in company never offer to sing unless you are perfectly confident of your ability to satisfy the expectations of those present. If asked to sing, unless of ability to do so, be not too ready to accept the invitation, but wait till it is tendered you again, so that, in case of failure, you be not looked so unfavorably upon as if you had accepted readily; the same rule applies to playing upon instruments. When singing or playing reply to only one encore; to more, merely bow or offer your excuses.
