But Diphilus in his Parasite, when a wedding-feast is about to take place, represents the parasite as speaking thus—

Do you not know that in the form of curse
These words are found, If any one do fail
To point the right road to a traveller,
To quench a fire; or if any one spoil
The water of a spring or well, or hinders
A guest upon his way when going to supper?

And Eubulus says in his Œdipus—

The man who first devised the plan of feasting
At other folk's expense, must sure have been
A gentleman of very popular manners;
But he who ask'd a friend or any stranger
To dinner, and then made him bear his share,
May he be banish'd, and his goods all seized.

36. And Diodorus of Sinope, in his Orphan Heiress, has these expressions, when speaking of a parasite, and they are not devoid of elegance—

[[377]] I wish to show and prove beyond a doubt
How reputable, and how usual too,
This practice is; a most divine contrivance.
Other arts needed not the gods to teach them;
Wise men invented them; but Jove himself
Did teach his friends to live as parasites,
And he confessedly is king o' the gods.
For he does often to men's houses come,
And cares not whether they be rich or poor;
And wheresoe'er he sees a well-laid couch,
And well-spread table near, supplied with all
That's good or delicate, he sits him down,
And asks himself to dinner, eats and drinks,
And then goes home again, and pays no share.
And I now do the same. For when I see
Couches prepared, and handsome tables loaded,
And the door open to receive the guests,
I enter in at once, and make no noise,
But trim myself, behaving quietly,
To give no great annoyance to my neighbour,
And then, when I have well enjoy'd the whole
That's set before me, and when I have drunk
Of delicate wines enough, I home return,
Like friendly Jupiter. And that such a line
Was always thought respectable and honest,
I now will give you a sufficient proof.
This city honours Hercules exceedingly,
And sacrifices to him in all the boroughs,
And at these sacred rites it ne'er admits
The common men, or parasites, or beggars;
But out of all the citizens it picks
Twelve men of all the noblest families,
All men of property and character;
And then some rich men, imitating Hercules,
Select some parasites, not choosing those
Who are the wittiest men, but who know best
How to conciliate men's hearts with flattery;
So that if any one should eat a radish,
Or stinking shad, they'd take their oaths at once
That he had eaten lilies, roses, violets;
And that if any odious smell should rise,
They'd ask where you did get such lovely scents.
So that because these men behave so basely,
That which was used to be accounted honourable,
Is now accounted base.

37. And Axionicus, in his Chalcidian, says—

When first I wish'd to play the parasite
With that Philoxenus, while youth did still
Raise down upon my cheeks, I learnt to bear
Hard blows from fists, and cups and dishes too,

[[378]] And bones, so great that oftentimes I was
All over wounds; but still it paid me well,
For still the pleasure did exceed the pain.
And even in some sort I did esteem
The whole affair desirable for me.
Is a man quarrelsome, and eager too
To fight with me? I turn myself to him;
And all the blame which he does heap upon me,
I own to be deserved; and am not hurt.
Does any wicked man call himself good?
I praise that man, and earn his gratitude.
To day if I should eat some boilèd fish
I do not mind eating the rest to-morrow.
Such is my nature and my principle.

But Antidotus, in his play which is entitled Protochorus, introduces a man resembling those who in the Museum of Claudius still practise their sophistries; whom it is not even creditable to remember; and he represents him speaking thus—